Leah: Welcome all! After a nice stay in the hospital, I’m all better now. Don’t make a living shadow mad at you.
Wendy: Yeah, yeah, it’s all about you.
Leah: Anyways… Everyone welcome the Koopa princess and owner of Castle Seashell Supreme of Water Land, Wendy O. Koopa.
(Only a single clap is heard from the audience.)
Wendy: Well forget you all!
(Wendy gets up out of her seat and leaves the studio.)
Leah: Lakitu, if you don’t mind.
Lakitu: I’m on it.
(Lakitu flies out the studio doors, a few yells are heard a few seconds later. Lakitu comes back inside the studio carrying an angry Wendy on his fishing line. He places her back in her seat and takes his spot back behind the camera.)
Leah: Thank you.
Wendy: Why do I have to be here?
Leah: Because I’m going to interview you, remember?
Wendy: Oh yeah… Well, get on with it.
Leah: Okay, first off. Why did you copy Lemmy’s attack patterns in games such as Super Mario Bros. 3, Super Mario World, and Superstar Saga?
Wendy: Lemmy always seemed to confuse those stupid Mario Brothers with his moves, so I stole his ideas. He stole my wonderful idea in Super Mario Bros. 3, though! I saw the Brothers before he did!
Leah: Interesting. So why are you always so self-centered?
Wendy: I’m not self-centered, are you insane?! I just happen to know that I am way better than everyone else.
Leah: *cough* Yeah right…
Wendy: What was that?
Leah: Umm… Yeah, right.
Wendy: Yes, I know I’m the best Koopa to ever live.
Leah: So, why do you like water so much?
Wendy: It’s cool like me, fun to swim in, and, other than myself, it’s what keeps everyone alive.
Leah: (How does her family put up with her?) Well, water is very important…
Wendy: But not as important as me, right?
Leah: Sure, whatever. Moving right along…How are you able to throw such loud and long tantrums?
Wendy: That one is simple, I have many years of practice and DAD gave me big lungs to help me keep my breath longer.
Leah: Wonderful…
Wendy: I know, doesn’t it just make me even more wonderful?
Leah: I guess. One last question from me, and then we’ll get to the audience questions. In Super Mario World, why didn’t you wear your normal shoes while fighting Mario?
Wendy: I originally did have my shoes, but when I was climbing through the pipes of my room, they slipped off and fell into that stupid lava and burned up! Those were my favorite shoes, too!
Leah: All right, calm down…
Wendy: You can’t tell me what to do!
Leah: Then don’t calm down.
Wendy: Just to show you, I will.
Leah: Okay, to the audience questions. Seat number 135.
Toad: Why was your name Kootie Pie in the cartoons?
Wendy: We were given our nicknames according to our personalities, and I’m the most adorable Koopa to ever live, so it’s only common sense how I got mine.
Leah: Umm… Seat number 800.
Bow: Which one of your siblings do you like the most?
Wendy: I don’t like any of them, they all annoy me. Morton never shuts up, Larry spies on me too much, Roy’s too mean, Lemmy plays jokes on me, Ludwig’s always destroying my stuff when his inventions explode, and Iggy’s too much of a nerd.
Iggy (in audience): At least I’m not a spoiled brat!
Wendy: I’m telling King Dad!
Leah: Enough!
(Leah takes out her remote control and presses a green button. A hole opens under Iggy, making him fall into a pit with a few random Goombas and Koopas, some not moving.)
Leah: You two can fight after the show’s over. Seat number 222.
Bombette: How come you and your brothers aren’t ever in any of the sports games?
Wendy: King Dad just doesn’t want to get humiliated when his kids beat him, so he makes us stay at the castle.
Leah: All right, thanks for your time.
Wendy: You’re welcome, you should be happy to be in the presence of such a perfect Koopa as myself.
Leah: Actually, not so much.
(Leah presses the green button on her remote again. Another hole appears under Wendy, making her fall into the same pit that Iggy is trapped in.)
Wendy: You can’t do this to me!
Lakitu: End transmission.
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