(We see Castle Bleck and Dimentio with papers in his hand.)
Dimentio: Count, can I have some money?
Count Bleck: For what?
Dimentio: Well, Mario is suing me for traumatizing him and Luigi is suing me for attempted murder. Really, ATTEMPTED murder? All that happened was he got trapped in a painting.
Count Bleck: No, you can't have money.
Dimentio: Oh, and I need money to bribe Peach to lift her restraining order for the Interview. So PLEASE give me some money like a hobo in the Great Depression.
Count Bleck: FINE! Only for the Peach bribe, okay?
Dimentio: Well, good enough.
(Count Bleck hands him the money and Dimentio leaves his room.)
Dimentio: Welcome to-
Lemmy: Lemmy's Interview Show!
Dimentio: One day I will get a studio and then you won’t be able to interfere. AHAHAHAHA!
Lemmy: Until that day comes, this is MY show.
(Lemmy leaves.)
Dimentio: Now please give a HUGE round of applause for Princess Peach!
(Peach comes out with some Toad retainers.)
Dimentio: Lovely to see you, Peach.
Peach: Where is my money?
(Dimentio hands her the money.)
Dimentio: Let's get this started. Question one: What's up with the Toad Retainers?
Peach: They are my bodyguards.
Dimentio: Well they don't do a good job like me when it’s my turn to pay the electricity bill. Anywho, question two: Why Toads?
Peach: Well Toads are actually very strong, but they do get scared easily.
Dimentio: Question three: How do you feel about getting arranged to be married to Mario?
Peach: Oh, I just wish we could get married right now, but Bowser just keeps ruining every opportunity. Oh, I wish I knew when we are going to be married.
Dimentio: Well I know of course. It is all in here The Dark Prognosticus.
Peach: WHAT?! GIVE IT TO ME!
Dimentio: No!
Peach: Okay, that's it!
The next few minutes are censored....
(We now see beaten Toad Retainers, an invitation in Dimentio's hand, and Peach with a smile on her face.)
Dimentio: After settling into an agreement we both got what we wanted like a pair of friends sharing their money. Now question four: How are you able to beat Bowser and everybody else in Brawl?
Peach: Well this is kind of a long one, so pay attention. Now Morton says that Melee and Brawl don't happen in the timeline BUT they do. You see, Nintendo wants everyone to get along with each other so they schedule these tournaments from time to time. As for how I beat people up, Jinx and The Master teach people how to fight in these tournaments. Also to keep with our personalities all the moves can only be done in these games. There you go.
Dimentio: Question five: Do you like me?
Peach: You are an evil, twisted little midget who wants nothing but to destroy every world and create a universe in your image. So yeah, I like you a little bit, but my heart belongs to Mario.
Dimentio: Oh well, good enough. It's time for AUDIENCE QUESTIONS!
(He sees the same people.)
Dimentio: Okay, time to cheat like Wario and Waluigi in any sport.
(He snaps his fingers and a random Shy Guy appears.)
Dimentio: Ask a question.
Shy Guy: Why do you rule most of the time instead of your dad?
Peach: Ever since my mother's death my father hasn't been the same. So I rule in his place most of the time.
(The Shy Guy disappears and Waluigi appears.)
Dimentio: Ask a question OR die.
Waluigi: How do you feel about the fact that my brother likes you?
Peach: He may have the money but he doesn't have the charm that Mario has.
O'Chunks: Hey Dimentio lad. Let me 'ave a chance to ask a question.
Dimentio: All right, go for it.
O'Chunks: Why did ye not appear in the first Smash Bros?
Peach: Well in order to get in that game we had to register. I didn't like it because at the time it looked barbaric, but after seeing how much fun it looked I regretted not registering.
Mimi: Dimentio, let me get a question too!
Dimentio: Okay.
Mimi: How do you feel about Daisy?
Peach: I don't like her. She has a terrible attitude and she got married before ME!
(Waluigi disappears and Bowser appears.)
Dimentio: Ask a question.
Bowser: How do you feel about always getting kidnapped by me?
Peach: Horrible! Why do you always go after ME?! Why not Daisy?!
Bowser: I don't know.
(With that Bowser grabs Peach and runs away.)
Dimentio: Oh dear, there is another lawsuit.
(Then the police break into the castle.)
Police: Dimentio, you are under arrest for attempted murder of Luigi.
Dimentio: You will never take me!
(Dimentio takes out the Chaos Heart and- nothing happens.)
Dimentio: Oh, that's right, Luigi is inside a painting.
(The police take Dimentio away.)
Count Bleck: Great, now we have to get him out.
(END TRANSMISSION)
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