Lord Shyguy: I'm bored, Bones.
Dark Bones: And?
Lord Shyguy: You're going to fix it.
Bones: How?
Lord Shyguy: Be entertaining.
Bones: um...
Lord Shyguy: Don't sass me, boy! BE ENTERTAINING!!!
Bones: Fine.
Lord Shyguy: I brought Dimentio to help.
Dimentio: ‘Sup, dawg?
Bones: NOT HIM!! AHHHHHHH!!!
(Bones falls over dead.)
Lord Shyguy: You're undead. You can't die.
Bones: I am? NOOOOOOO- Mph!
Dimentio: I shut you up like a mother putting duct tape over the mouth of a screaming child!
Lord Shyguy: Good for you. Now I'm going to kick you out like a tourist who broke the rules in Lemmy’s Land!
Dimentio: Hmm... I give you a five.
Lord Shyguy: FIRE IN THE HOLE!!!
(Dimentio gets blown up.)
Lord Shyguy: Woohoo! Five points!
Bones: I'm still here!
Lord Shyguy: I know. Hey! I have an idea! You can interview someone for my entertainment!
Bones: I refuse!
Lord Shyguy: Or you can end up like Dimentio.
(Pieces of Dimentio are lying in a bloody heap next to Bones.)
Bones: Fine. Who is the interviewee?
Lord Shyguy: The one, the only, former Glitz Pit champion, RAAAAAWWWK HAAAAAWWWK!
Audience: WOOOHOOO!!! YEAAAAAHHH!!!
Rawk Hawk: RAAAAAWWWK!!!
Bones: Okay. Thanks for telling.
Lord Shyguy: I have cameras everywhere. Don't leave the studio without finishing the Interview, or I'll blow you up.
Bones: Okay, you evil, evil man.
Lord Shyguy: I'm leaving.
(He leaves.)
Bones: Thank DAD he’s gone.
Rawk Hawk: Interview me!
Bones: I was getting to that!
Audience: RAAAAAWWWK HAAAAAWWWK!!! YEEEEAAAAH!!!
Bones: To... much... PRESSURE!!! RAAAAAAA!!!
(Bones turns a bright gold color with black flames surrounding him.)
Super Bones: YOU WILL ALL DIE, MORTALS!!!
(The audience goes silent.)
Super Bones: I WILL Destroy you... *pant, pant*
(Super Bones reverts back to Bones.)
Weird Secretary Voice: Rawk Hawk, Bones will see you now.
Rawk Hawk: O-okay.
Bones: So, what art thou stats?
Rawk Hawk: Well, my HP is 30, my attack is 4, and my defense is 1. I was in Paper Mario 2. And why are you talking like that?
Bones: Sorry, the computer bugged out.
Rawk Hawk: Okay.
Bones: Do you want to be in another game?
Rawk Hawk: OF COURSE!!! I want to be in Super Smash Bros. Brawl! I would be the best of all the characters!
Bones: Next question. What do you think of Goombella?
Rawk Hawk: She’s soooo dreamy! I think about her everyday. When she tattles on me she says, “A champion fighter. Battling him requires a certain level of artistry. You wanna hate me, but you can't help but love the RAAAAAAAWWWK!” *sigh*
Bones: Ah, young love. What are your attacks?
Rawk Hawk: Well, I can pull on the ceiling beams to make stuff fall on my opponent, slam into my opponent, and jump on them.
Bones: Time for... AUDIENCE QUESTIONS! Seat FIRSTGLITZPITCHAMPION.
Prince Mush: Why does the belt have a star on it?
Rawk Hawk: It’s for stars, like me!
Bones: Sure, riiiiiight. Seat WAKKAWAKKA.
Pac-man: When you were the champion, did you get lots of food?
Rawk Hawk: I got lots of money, so I could buy lots of food!
Bones: If only I could eat... Seat IDONTKNOWMYOWNGENDER.
Birdo: Where are you from?
Rawk Hawk: A galaxy far, far away.
Bones: You're a nerd. Last question. Seat NOONECARESABOUTME.
Toad: Why are you yellow?
Rawk Hawk: Birth defect.
Bones: That’s all the ti-
(Lord Shyguy smashes through the wall.)
Lord Shyguy: WAIT! Before you leave, Rawk Hawk, I'll have you know that Bones thinks you're weak.
Bones: WHAAT?!
Rawk Hawk: Oh, you're going down!
Lord Shyguy: Bye, Bones! Have fun!
Bones: Grrrrrr...
RPG Battle Start!
Bones: 2525
VS.
Rawk Hawk: 3030
Bones used Bone Throw! 5 damage!
Rawk Hawk used Deafening Audience Roar!
Rawk Hawk: RAAAAAWWWK!!!
Audience: WOOOHOOO!!! YEAH!!! ALL RIGHT!!!
Bones took 24.99 damage!
Bones: .0125
VS.
Rawk Hawk: 2530
Bones: To... much... PRESSURE!!!
Bones turns into Super Bones (again).
Super Bones: WROOOOAAARR!!!
Super Bones: 250250
VS.
Rawk Hawk: 2530
Super Bones used Apocalypse Cannon! 9,999,999 damage!
Super Bones: 250250
VS.
Rawk Hawk: -9,999,97430
Rawk Hawk: ... Can't... go... on...
BATTLE END!
(Super Bones turns back into Bones.)
Bones: *pant, pant* ... Need... air...
(Lord Shyguy walks in.)
Lord Shyguy: Hmmmm, so he can breathe. I always wondered... I'll need to look into this more. Before I forget, enter your name on a piece of paper and give it to me and you might win a fabulous prize! END TRANSMISSION!
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