PlayStop

VAD interviews BOWSER
 
By Shadow Matt

(We see a note in a hand. The hand belongs to none other than Matt.)

Note: I'll be gone governing Ice Land and watching over my mansion that no one other than P.T. has bothered to mention, so interview or I'll burn your Koopaling votes somehow. -Lemmy

Matt: *%^&$&%&*%&%*(! I need to become a Super Koopa!

(Suddenly a figure crashes through the roof and hits the note.)

Note: NOOOOOOO!!! *dies*

Matt: Vad! Where were you last Interview?!

Vad: You know where I was! In your comic!

Matt: Oh yeah. Interview or die!

Vad: Fine.

Later...

Note 2: Welcome to...

Matt: JAVELIN THROW!!!

(Matt throws a javelin through Note 2, and it perishes.)

Vad: Was that needed? It just wanted a life!

Matt: I think it lived its purpose. You're interviewing Bowser now!

(Bowser pops up in the interviewee chair in a flash.)

Bowser: What happened?! I was just finally teaching Morton to shut up!

Matt: I did that. Interview first.

Bowser: Fine.

Vad: First off, in Super Mario Sunshine, why were you so big?

Bowser: Ludwig added a special potion that increased the size of the current King of the Koopas, so that's why it didn't affect Jr.

Vad: So that's why the pool was so dirty. Second, why do you hate Mario? All he's done is thwart your schemes over and over.

Bowser: Look, you try kidnapping the opposing ruler that's attacking you, and get defeated.

Matt: Now I know how you feel. I kidnapped King Sammer and tried to rule his kingdom. I lost.

Vad: Enough filler! Next, why don't you attack Mario first, then kidnap Peach?

Bowser: Well, th-

Matt: Anything about the universe, I'm using Chaos Spear on ya.

Bowser: Fine. It's in the Villain's Rules of Conquering Kingdoms: “Give heroes a chance!”

Vad: ... Idiot. Next, how did you get that hair? Is it a symbol or something?

Bowser: The King of the Koopas gets it when he becomes king. It grows immediately, so if a regular Koopa becomes king, he gets it. The king keeps it too, so if there's a new King, the old king still keeps it.

Vad: Okay, next question. Why do you use minions that can be used against each other?

Bowser: Koopas can take about two hits, and that's good enough for me!

Vad: Moron... Last one before the audience. After the last game they were in, why didn’t you use the Koopalings until New Super Mario Bros. Wii?

Bowser: Aside from them being used in Mario & Luigi: Superstar Saga, I grounded them for eating the last cookies.

Vad: And Bowletta doesn't count. Audience! Seat NOTE3.

Note 3: Have yo-

Matt: CHAOS SPEAR!

(A spear is generated out of thin air and kills the note.)

Note 4: Noooooo…

Vad: ... Seat IAMINMOREMARIOGAMESTHANTHEKOOPLINGSHAHA.

Bowser Jr: Why did you tell me that Peach was my mama?

Bowser: I was hoping that you would help me against Mario. Boy, am I glad I did!

Matt: Interview's over! Out, now! Chaos...

Note 4: RUN AWAY!!!

Vad: Chaos Control!

Matt: Blast!

(Everyone disappears, and Matt destroys the studio room.)

Later...

Lemmy: I'm back from Ice Land and- OH MY DAD, WHAT HAPPENED HERE?!

(Lemmy sees the destruction that Matt caused using Chaos Blast. Vad teleports out of thin air.)

Vad: Please, don't ask. End Transmission!

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