Behind the scenes...
Nintendo 4vr: I’m really bored.
Vivian: I wish we had someone to interview.
Dimentio: How ‘bout me?
Nintendo 4vr: Nice try.
Dimentio: The day will come… I know it…
Vivian: Keep on dreaming.
Dimentio: Hey Nin, if I could get somebody for you to interview could I help interview too?
(Dimentio looks at Nintendo 4vr with sparkling anime eyes.)
Nintendo: Two somebodies to interview, then yes.
Vivian: Noooo!!! You’re replacing me with Dimentio?!
Nintendo 4vr: No, no. He’s just interviewing with us, if he can manage to find two characters.
Vivian: Noooo-
Dimentio: Ciao!
Vivian: Showoff…
Nintendo 4vr: How?
Meanwhile...
(Dimentio sees Hills with Eyes in the Grass and Jade Blooper training.)
Dimentio: (whispering) Perfect...
Back at the studio...
Vivian: What is taking him so-
(Dimentio comes back with a potato sack and drops it on the studio floor. The bag is squirming…)
Nintendo 4vr: What the?!
(The bag rips with Hills with Eyes and Jade Blooper tied up and mouths taped up.)
Vivian: Oh my gosh! What did you do to them?!
Dimentio: I brought them over here to be interviewed like you requested.
Nintendo 4vr: I asked for two characters to be brought here, not to be threatened and tied up! Now help me untie them, Vivian!
(All three of them help untie the two Sammer Guys.)
A few minutes later...
Nintendo 4vr: Are you guys all right?
Jade Blooper: Enough to not kill him!
Vivian: Settle down. Anyway, you guys came here to be interviewed, but after the kidnapping, you probably do not want to be interviewed.
Hills with Eyes: We’ll do it for you guys, but not for being captured.
Nintendo 4vr: Great! Oh, and Dimentio?
Dimentio: Yes?
Nintendo 4vr: I don’t know how to say this but-
Vivian: You can’t interview with us!
Dimentio: We had a DEAL!
Nintendo 4vr: Ok, but if you get killed by them you-
Dimentio: See ya, guys, I’ll be in the lounge playing pool if you need me.
(Dimentio leaves.)
Nintendo 4vr: Well, since we have no audience, let’s go to a private studio so they can just call. Vivian?
Vivian: Oh yeah! Al lright, huddle up, everyone! See, I don’t know why you-
(They all warp to the private studio.)
Vivian: -need Dimentio because I can warp anyone and fetch anyone to interview in a nice way too.
Nintendo 4vr: It’s okay. All right guys, someone call Laki-
(Lakitu appears.)
Lakitu: Did I hear my name being called in a way that I have to film an Interview?
Nintendo 4vr: Correct! 2,000 points!
Lakitu: All right! Guys ready?
All: Yep.
Lakitu: All right, 5, 4, 3, 2, 1…
Nintendo 4vr: Welcome, everyone to my interview show! You wouldn’t have guessed what I’ve been through today! See, my partner, Dimentio, got overeager trying to find me a partner and, well, lemme just get to the point where I start to introduce the interviewees. Please give a hand for Hills with Eyes and Jade Blooper!
Hills and Jade: (in a Japanese tone) Conichiwa.
Nintendo 4vr: Translation?
Jade: Hello in Japanese.
Nintendo 4vr: Oh! Conichiwa. Ready for the questions?
Both: Yes.
Nintendo 4vr: All right! For both, how did you become Sammer Guys?
Hills: In Japan, when we were young, Jade and I knew each other since nursery school, and wanted to be the same thing when we grew up: a Sammer Guy.
Jade: We trained every day, doing push ups, blocking, and all.
Hills: Once we were old enough, all our hard work paid off. We were tested by King Sammer, who would tell you a couple of exercises to do for him: punch a tree and catch all the leaves that come off of it, stuff like that. So now, we are Sammer Guys!
Nintendo 4vr: I see. Well, Vivian, it’s your turn now.
Vivian: Thank you, Nin. My question to you guys is- I just lost it. *sigh*
Nintendo 4vr: Vivian!
Vivian: Oh, now I know! How does King Sammer rank you guys?
Jade: Like we said, he trains us and decides what Sammer rank we would be.
Hills: Sadly, we got the first two ranks, which stinks so bad.
Vivian: Don’t worry. I know you guys will improve.
Both: Really?
Vivian: Of course! It’s not the end of the world! Well, it almost was... Anyway, your turn, Nin.
Nintendo 4vr: Thank you. Does King Sammer provide anything when you make it to one of the 100 Sammer Guys?
Hills: Yes, a robe and a weapon, but we could use our own if we want to.
Nintendo 4vr: Oh, that’s good. Vivian?
Vivian: Yeah?
Nintendo 4vr: Your turn?
Vivian: Sorry, what do you do when you are not battling?
Jade: King Sammer gives us a vacation at a private resort he made especially for us Sammer Guys.
Nintendo 4vr: Lucky, I wish Lemmy treated us that way when I’m off.
Vivian: Phone questions time!!!
Phone: Ring Ring!
Daisy: Do all Sammer Guys live in the same place?
Jade: Yes we do, but only if we have a battle the following day.
Phone: Ring Ring!
Luvbi: Art though train where?
Hills: We train in a stadium that is one level below the battle arena.
Phone: Ring Ring!
Goombario: How many years do you have to stay before you can retire?
Hills: At least three years.
Nintendo 4vr: Time, Lakitu?
Lakitu: Five more minutes.
Nintendo 4vr: One more question!
Phone: Ring Ring!
Mimi: What if you guys train hard and King Sammer, like, approves?
Jade: King Sammer holds a tournament once a year and if you beat a Sammer Guy that is a higher level than you, you swap places.
Mimi: Wow. Have you beaten anybody?
Jade: No, not last year, but the next tournament is two months from now and we will claim a new Sammer level!
Nintendo 4vr: Thank you for tuning in to my interview show. Tune in next time on my interview show!
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