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BIRBY6, ELLA, AND BLUEYTROOPA interview PARATROOPA
 
By birby6

Bill Nye: Science!

Dark Koopa: Still stealing my thunder!

Mr. L: The Green Thunder!

Birby6: Wow. Three idiotic comments and the Interview hasn’t even started yet.

Ella: You can say that again.

Blueytroopa: Yup.

Birby6: *looks at audience* Oh! I completely forgot! Viewers out there, I’d like to introduce you to my crew! Why don’t you guys introduce yourselves?

(Ella; Hi! I’m Ella, the baby pink Yoshi, and- Wait a minute… Aren’t I supposed to be backstage?!)

Birby6: You do know we’re on television, right?

(Ella looks at the camera for a few seconds, then faints.)

Blueytroopa: She has stage fright.

Birby6: And this is Blueytroopa!

Blueytroppa: I’m a blue Paratroopa, a rare species! *notices the camera* O_O Hello! I’d like to thank…

(He pulls out a long list that goes over Ella’s fainted body then all across Plit.)

3 hours later...

Blueytroopa: …my great grandfather, my cousin Ed, my mom, my uncle Freddy, my…

Birby6: Enough!

(Birby6 pulls out a flamethrower and burns the list. Where he got it from and how he’s holding it is a mystery.)

Inspector Pennington: There’s a mystery to solve!

Birby6: *anime sweatdrop*

Blueytroopa: Aww. I had 10,000 more to go…

Birby6: You’re starting to sound like Morton.

Morton: Yeah. You’re starting to sound like me. Come on. There can only be one me. No clones. No copies. No….

(Morton gets attacked by a mob of angry farmers.)

Birby6: That’ll shut him up. Today I interview a Paratroopa.

Blueytroopa: You mean me?

Birby6: No! Him!

(A Paratroopa comes in looking confused)

Paratroopa: I like onions!

Birby6: Would you like to answer the first question, Blueytroopa?

Blueytroopa: Boy! Would I! My question is in most games, like Super Mario Bros. 3, why do you jump a lot?

Paratroopa: What did you say about onions?

Blueytroopa: I didn’t say anything about onions.

Birby6: *grabs a megaphone* She said “WHY DO YOU JUMP IN MOST GAMES?”

Paratroopa: Oh. Secretly we had springy shoes on our feet, allowing us to jump uncontrollably!

Birby6: Good. Now another question! Why are you Bowser’s main minions?

Paratroopa: Because he’s a Koopa himself and because our shells have good defense.

Blueytroopa: Can I please ask a question?

Birby6: Knock yourself out.

Blueytroopa: Ok!

(Blueytroopa grabs a baseball bat.)

Birby6: Not literally! I meant ask a question!

(Blueytroopa puts the baseball bat down.)

Blueytroopa: OH! You should’ve said beforehand! My question is, is your species related to turtles from the human world?

Paratroopa: To tell you the truth, our species are mutated turtles from the human world! The turtles fell in a bowl of radioactive waste that mutated them.

Birby6: What are you? A Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtle?

Paratroopa: Well I used to work for them.

Birby6: What made you retire?

Paratroopa: Onions!

Birby6:-_- I can see… Anyway, I have a question. Why does your species have wings?

Paratroopa: We evolved over time, like Goombas! Only some of us evolved though.

Birby6: Ok. Since I can’t think of any more questions I’m going to have to ask a random person.

(The Eyeless Goomba walks by)

Birby6: He’ll have to do. BLUEYTROOPA!

(Blueytroopa gets in a chicken suit and does the chicken dance while dancing in a bowl of applesauce that is so obscure it gets the Eyeless Goomba onstage.)

Birby6: Thank you, Blueytroopa. (to the Eyeless Goomba) Listen here, bub. Ask a question or I will force Lemmy to put you in one of Dark Koopa’s Interviews! You don’t want that to happen, now, do you?

(The Eyeless Goomba nervously shakes his head no.)

Birby6: Good. Now ASK A QUESTION!

Eyeless Goomba: Ummmmm… Why did you wear shades in Paper Mario?

Paratroopa: It was really sunny so we HAD to wear shades.

Birby6: Interesting. Now I have a question. I heard your counterparts, Dark Paratroopas, were going to appear in the game Paper Mario. What caused them to not appear?

Paratroopa: They evolved in the sewers. Their wings eventually came off. *notices the fainted Ella* Is that roadkill?

Birby6: No. She fainted.

Paratroopa: That means she’s fresh! Yummy!

(Paratroopa starts biting Ella’s arm. Ella wakes up and notices Paratroopa biting her.)

Ella: OW! OW! OW! What do you think I am? Roadkill?

Paratroopa: Yes. Yes I do.

Ella: Get off me!

(She tosses him into the Eyeless Goomba.)

Eyeless Goomba: Why me?!

One trip to the hospital later...

Birby6: Thanks a lot Ella. Now we have to be IN A STUPID HOSPITAL!

Ella: We didn’t need to interview him, we could’ve interviewed… *looks around and sees the Eyeless Goomba* the Eyeless Goomba!

Eyeless Goomba (in a full body cast): Mmmmpth!

Birby6: Sorry. He’s too accident prone!

Ella: It’s true…

Birby6: Ok. Time for audience questions!

Ella: But we’re at the hospital!

Birby6: *anime sweatdrop*

Ella: I’m also going back to the studio so I don’t have to be with this weird, one-eyed freak!

(Ella leaves and slams the door.)

Blueytroopa: Umm… *looks at camera* Send get well cards!

(Roy then bursts in.)

Roy: Ha! Found you! Time for a beating for sneaking into the Sports Hall that one day!

Flashback...

(We see birby6 trying to get in Roy’s Sports Hall.)

Roy: Ticket please!

Birby6: Ummmm… Look, pancakes!

Roy: Pancakes?! Where?!

(Roy looks away, allowing birby6 to sneak in.)

End of flashback...

Birby6: Uhhh… Activate the knockout gas!

(Gas soon takes over the whole room. Everyone except Birby6 and Blueytroopa gets knocked out.)

Blueytroopa: How come we’re not knocked out?

Birby6: Uhh… End transmission!

(Birby6 notices Goombario is knocked out.)

Birby6: Great. What an ending.

Navy Commander: I want a sub sandwich!

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