Lemmy: Hello, and welcome to Dark Koopa's Interview Show!

Dark Koopa: Thanks for the mind-control device, Ludwig.

(Ludwig winks and points, while making a clicking sound.)

Dark Koopa: Don't do that again.

Fun Guy Fungi: Hey, if it's Ludwig's invention, why didn't it ex-

BOOM!

Fun Guy Fungi: -plode.

Lemmy: My head hurts.

Thumbs: The interviewee this time is Rip Van Fish.

Dark Koopa: Oh great. Another fish. Well, first ques-

Rip Van Fish: Zzz...

Dark Koopa: Wake up.

Rip Van Fish: Zzz...

Dark Koopa: WAKE UP!

Rip Van Fish: Zzz...

Dark Koopa: I hate my job.

(Dark Koopa throws a stick in front of Rip Van Fish. Mario runs onto the stage to fetch it.)

Rip Van Fish: Zzz- Huh? Mario?

(Mario gives the stick to Dark Koopa.)

Dark Koopa: Good boy. Now, go get it!

(Dark Koopa throws the stick into a black hole. Mario goes after it.)

Dark Koopa: Now that you're awake I-

Rip Van Fish: Zzz...

Dark Koopa: Pink!

Rip Van Fish: Alright! I'm up!

Dark Koopa: Why do you sleep so much?

Rip Van Fish: Bowser never lets us have any caffeine. I don't think he likes us.

Dark Koopa: If you're not a Cheep Cheep, how come you kinda look like one?

Rip Van Fish: We are Cheep Cheeps. It's just that Kamek gave us this weird nickname.

Dark Koopa: Why'd he do that?

Rip Van Fish: He thinks we're the most likely to be killed since we sleep so much.

In some other dimension...

Larry: Oh great. Stuck in some weird dimension with Peach and Susan.

Susan: I love you too!

(A plothole opens up.)

Susan: Oh look, a plothole!

Peach: I hate plotholes! I'm not touching it!

Susan: What about you, Larry?

Larry: Let's see. Different dimension. Susan. Different dimension. Susan. Nope. I think I'll stay here.

Susan: If you stay, I stay.

Larry: ARGH! Fine.

(Larry and Susan jump into the plothole and it takes them to a deserted island.)

Larry: NOOOOO!

Susan: YESSSS!

Iggy: MAYBEEEE! What?

Back at the studio...

Dark Koopa: Time for audience questions. Seat 3.

X-Nauts: WE ARE X-NAUTS!

Lord Crump: Ex-actly!

Dark Koopa: That's nice. Seat 7.

Roy: Why do you chase Mario but other Cheep Cheeps don't?

Rip Van Fish: Well, at the time, we were the only Cheep Cheeps in Bowser's army. The other Cheep Cheeps only attacked Mario if he got too close to them.

Dark Koopa: Seat 10.

Mr. Game and Watch: Beep!

Pink: Eww, it's Mr. Game and Watch!

Thumbs: Kill it!

(Dark Koopa drops an anvil on Mr. Game and Watch.)

Dark Koopa: What a disgusting creature. Seat 9.

Wendy: How come you only wake up when Mario approaches you?

Rip Van Fish: Well, the guy is always snacking on something. And do you know how loud he chews?

Wendy: Yes, unfortunately, I do.

Dark Koopa: Seat 8.

Morton: Why didn't you appear in any game other than Mario World? Like maybe Mario 3? Or Mario 64? Or-

Dark Koopa: Pink!

Morton: I knew I shouldn't have come back in here.

(Morton runs out of the studio.)

Rip Van Fish: Well, Bowser didn't hire Cheep Cheeps until Mario World, and after that game we all quit and got to buy coffee again. Except me. I spent all my money on car insurance.

Ludwig: Then you should've switched to Geico.

Rip Van Fish: Thanks for the info...

Dark Koopa: Seat 1.

Thumbs: Why are all Rip Van Fish blue?

Rip Van Fish: Bowser's really picky. He only hired blue Cheep Cheeps.

Dark Koopa: What are you doing in the audience?

Thumbs: I believe my role in this Interview is unacceptable. I say-

Dark Koopa: Sheesh. What a chatterbox. You're worse than Morton. Anyway, that's all we have for today. See you next time on-

Lemmy: Da- Lemmy's Interview Show!

Dark Koopa: Darn. I thought that'd work.

Thumbs: Hey! I'm not done complaining!

Dark Koopa: End transmission.

Thumbs: Errr...