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PYRO GUY interviews CHAINED KONG
 
By Pyro Guy

Pyro Guy: Hello there all you amazing peoples!

Conrad: You're awfully happy today!

Pyro Guy: Well, I get to do an extreme Interview today!

Conrad: With who?

Chained Kong: OOK! I'm here for the Interview.

(Pyro Guy grins evilly. No on can tell under his mask though.)

Conrad: I see where this is going. HEAD FOR THE HILLS!!!

(He leads most of the audience away.)

Chained Kong: Soo, do we start now?

Pyro Guy: Sure, hehehe. Now, why do you live in Barrel Volcano?

Chained Kong: I love the heat. Plus most of the enemies down there are actually OOK friendly. And I can bully most of them into doing whatever I want.

(Pyro Guy presses a button and an anvil drops on Chained Kong.)

Chained Kong: OOOOOK!!!

Pyro Guy: Extreme Interview. I only wanted two reasons.

Chained Kong: You never said that!

Pyro Guy: Don't question me!

(He drops another anvil.)

Chained Kong: OOK!

Pyro Guy: Cheater.

Chained Kong: What?

Pyro Guy: Nothing. Now, why were you always with Vomers?

Chained Kong: They just liked me. I think they wanted to eat my flesh though, so I moved to the Forest Maze with my cousins.

Pyro Guy: So you are related to Guerillas?

Chained Kong: Of course.

Pyro Guy: You should learn to stand your ground.

Chained Kong: Oh no- OOK!

(This time the anvil is replaced by another Chained Kong.)

Pyro Guy: Now for the obvious question. Explain your chains.

Chained Kong: These things are a great way to workout. They give us the extra strength and variation to separate us from our cousins.

Pyro Guy: You should've learned to use special attacks.

(He drops another anvil.)

Chained Kong: STOP THAT! And we're monkeys! What did you expect from us?!

Pyro Guy: Double anvil for that.

Chained Kong: OOK!

Pyro Guy: Last question from me. What do you think about cinnamon?

Chained Kong: That was incredibly random.

Pyro Guy: No answer, BURN!

Chained Kong: OOK! How did that hurt?

Pyro Guy: Answer me!

Chained Kong: It tastes good!

Pyro Guy: Wrong. (under breath) Not really. Anvil!!!

Chained Kong: OOOOOKKKK!!!

Pyro Guy: Audience questions, seat IWILLSWALLOWYOURSOUL! Disturbing.

Glum Reaper: Do you consider yourself a *sigh* narcissus?

Chained Kong: What? Of course not! I just know that I'm better than everyone else!

Pyro Guy: Learn what narcissus means. And have an anvil.

Chained Kong: OOK!

Pyro Guy: Seat SPELLCASTER!

Kamek: What is your greatest weakness?

Chained Kong: Ice. Wait, oh no!

Pyro Guy: I invited him just for that. Idiot.

(He drops yet another anvil.)

Chained Kong: Ook!

Pyro Guy: You do realize your win over Wrench Guy was cheap? Right?

Chained Kong: No! I won fair and square!

Pyro Guy: Not what I wanted to hear. Kamek?

Kamek: With pleasure. ICICLE STORM!

Chained Kong: OOOOOKKKK!

(He passes out.)

Pyro Guy: Hehehe. End Transmission everyone.

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