Dark Koopa: Hello and welc-
Lemmy: Lemmy's Interview Show!
Dark Koopa: A bit early, Lemmy.
Lemmy: Whoops.
Dark Koopa: I've decided I want to be an audience member today, so I have a replacement, but don't worry: I'll still have my stupid comments.
Kyle: Hello everyone. Today, I interview Bullet Bill. Thanks to Ludwig, this is possible, for he has built two teleporters so Bullet Bill will go in those instead of crashing into the wall.
Bullet Bill: I'm here.
Kyle: Okay. First question: Why can't you ever stop moving?
Bullet Bill: That's all we're programmed to do. We just go in a straight line. It's not like we had brakes installed.
Silence...
Dark Koopa: What? You expected a stupid comment? Not yet.
Kyle: Why do Bombshell Bills have more attack and HP than regular Bullet Bills?
Bullet Bill: That's easy. Because Bombshell Bills are made of gold, which is a stronger material than what we are made out of.
Kyle: What are you made out of?
Bullet Bill: Aluminum.
Dark Koopa: Aluminum? Lame.
Kyle: Who controls your Bill Blasters?
Bullet Bill: Almost anyone can control a Bill Blaster, but Bombshell Bill Blasters are a special case. Only Bowser's elite guards such as Magikoopas or Koopatrols can control them.
Kyle: Any advantages to being shot out of a Bill Blaster?
Bullet Bill: We can't be harmed as long as we're inside of one. Also, if a Bill Blaster gets powered up, so do we.
(Mario does the Macarina.)
Dark Koopa: That's amusing.
Kyle: Can you explain where a Banzai Bill comes from?
Bullet Bill: They come from Super Bill Blasters. They are very rare, so they were well hidden. That's why Mario has never seen one.
Mario: The super secret shoe store?
Bullet Bill: No.
Kyle: Why do Banzai Bills move so slowly?
Bullet Bill: Because they're so big!
Kyle: I was expecting a more scientific answer but whatever. Where are Bullet Bills made?
Bullet Bill: In Iggy's room.
Iggy: Woohoo! Finally, some credit!
Bullet Bill: I never said you make us. Ludwig makes us in Iggy's room because he has no room in his.
Iggy: It's a lie!
Kyle: How do some Bullet Bills home in on Mario?
Bullet Bill: Those are ones that have been given heat-seeking capabilities. They are usually the color purple.
Kyle: What is the average lifespan of a Bullet Bill after it is shot out of it's Bill Blaster?
Bullet Bill: With us hitting the wall and Mario jumping on us, I'd say about 8 seconds.
Kyle: Interesting.
Bullet Bill: In fact, I think I'm the longest living Bullet Bill ever! Yippee!
Kyle: Okay. Time for audience questions. Seat 9.
Dark Koopa: I better get to say 'end transmission'.
Kyle: Whatever. Seat 14.
Pink Yoshi: Do you like Yoshis?
Bullet Bill: Of course not! I hate Yoshis. They're stupid.
(Pink's eyes turn that icy color again.)
Dark Koopa: Where have I seen this before?
Pink Yoshi: Do you like Yoshis?
Junior: Of course not! I hate Yoshis. They're stupid.
(Pink's eyes turn that icy color again.)
Dark Koopa: Oh yeah.
(Pink jumps on the Bullet Bill, causing it to explode.)
Kyle: That's all we have for today. See you next time on-
Lemmy: Lemmy's Interview Show!
Siro: End Transmission.
Dark Koopa: You again?!
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