BABY DONKEY KONG interviews BIDDYBUDS
 
By Iggy Koopa
Iggy K: Hey, Baby DK!  
 
Baby DK (snacking on a banana): Yeah?  
 
Iggy K: You haven’t done anything since Lydia, so do you want to interview our next vic- I mean, interviewee?  
 
Baby DK: Uh, sure. *drops banana* Who is it?  
 
Iggy K: It says here… that it’s Biddybud.  
 
Baby DK: You mean the little ladybug from Super Mario 3D Land? Sounds easy.  
 
Iggy K: All right, go on then.  
 
Baby DK walks onstage.  
 
Baby DK: Welcome to-  
 
Lemmy: LEMMY’S INTERVIEW SHOW!  
 
Baby DK: Iggy’s.  
 
Lemmy: Lemmy’s.  
 
Baby DK: Iggy’s.  
 
Lemmy: Lemmy’s.  
 
Baby DK: Lemmy’s.  
 
Lemmy: Iggy’s.  
 
Baby DK: Lemmy’s.  
 
Lemmy: Iggy’s.  
 
Baby DK: Fine, have it your way. Welcome to-  
 
Lemmy: IGGY’S INTERVIEW- Wait a minute!!!  
 
Baby DK: Today we will be interviewing BIDDYBUD!  
 
Red, Green, Blue, Pink, Orange, and Yellow Biddybuds walk up.  
 
Baby DK: Or… BiddybudS?  
 
Red: Hi.  
 
Green: We’re.  
 
Blue: Here.  
 
Pink: To.  
 
Yellow: Be.  
 
Orange: Interviewed.  
 
Baby DK: Ok, that could be kinda annoying. Q1: What do you think of being weaker then Goombas?  
 
Red: It’s.  
 
Green: Very.  
 
Blue: Annoying.  
 
Pink: Everyone.  
 
Yellows: Teases.  
 
Orange: Us.  
 
Baby DK: … Q2: Do you have names?  
 
Red: Clyde.  
 
Green: Gem.  
 
Blue: Violet.  
 
Pink: Lizza.  
 
Yellow: Yemmer.  
 
Orange: Rahn.  
 
Baby DK: … Q3: Do you have to speak one word at a time?  
 
Clyde: Yes.  
 
Gem: That’s.  
 
Violet: Why.  
 
Lizza: We’re.  
 
Yemma: Always.  
 
Rahn: Together.  
 
Baby DK: … Cool. Phone questions!  
 
Jackster: Call 1.  
 
Phone: It’s me, Luigi. How do you get your colors?  
 
Clyde: It’s.  
 
Gem: Because.  
 
Violet: Of.  
 
Lizza: The.  
 
Yemma: Temperature.  
 
Luigi: Cool!  
 
Jackster: Call 2.  
 
Phone: Birdo here. Do you enjoy your colors?  
 
Rahn: No.  
 
Birdo: Oh… Why?  
 
Clyde: Because.  
 
Gem: Of.  
 
Violet: The.  
 
Lizza: Temperature.  
 
Yemma: It’s.  
 
Rahn: Random  
 
Birdo: So you don’t get to pick, so sometimes you don’t like it.  
 
Biddybuds: Yes.  
 
Birdo: K, thanks!  
 
Jackster: Call 3!  
 
Phone: Yoshi here. Yoshi want know if Biddybuds like Goombas.  
 
Clyde: No.  
 
Gem: We.  
 
Violet: Hate.  
 
Lizza: Them.  
 
Yemma: They’re.  
 
Rahn: Rivals.  
 
Yoshi: Ooh.  
 
Baby DK: All right, one last question from the audience. Seat… 101.  
 
Shadow: WAHAHAHAHA! YOOZ WILL LOOZ!  
 
Baby DK: Noooooo! Security!  
 
The same Dayzee appears.  
 
Dayzee: We are experiencing technical difficulties. Please wait until they are fixed.  
 
The picture cuts out. Voices are heard from the background.  
 
???: What’s wrong, Boss?  
 
???: Get him!  
 
???: Don’t try, because YOOZ WILL LOOZ!  
 
???: Help.  
 
???: Us.  
 
???: Please.  
 
???: Aaaaaaaaaaaah!  
 
???: Painness…  
 
???: Get him! Hurry!  
 
???: No, no, no! Not fair!  
 
???: Hammer time!  
 
The picture is restored and we see two beat-up Hammer Bros. holding a beat-up Shadow while Baby DK is standing with the horrified Biddybuds.  
 
Baby DK: So… do you want to become employees? We need more interviewers.  
 
Clyde: Um…  
 
Baby DK puts on a cute face.  
 
Biddybuds: Aw…  
 
Gem: Sure.  
 
Violet: Why.  
 
Lizza: Not?  
 
Yemma: We’ll.  
 
Rahn: Do.  
 
Clyde: The.  
 
Gem: Next.  
 
Violet: One.  
 
Baby DK: Yay!  
 
Lizza: Let’s.  
 
Yemma: End.  
 
Rahn: Transmission.

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