King Dedede- Hello, and welcome to...
Lemmy- Lemmy’s Interview Show!
King Dedede- So, who’s lucky enough to get interviewed by me?
Waddle Dee- Uh... here we go! Cackletta and Fawful!
King Dedede- ... Let’s get this over with.
Cackletta and Fawful arrive onstage. Fawful is wearing his headgear, while Cackletta hovers in.
Cackletta- So, you’re our interviewer?
King Dedede- Yep. That’s me!
Fawful- Didn’t the letter of questioning say that there would be two interviewers of interviewing?
King Dedede- He’ll be here in a minute!
Meta Knight crashes through the roof. He’s covered in saliva.
Meta Knight- Sorry I’m late, but Kirby ate my sword and I had to get it out. It was so disgusting in his mouth!
King Dedede- You could have asked for a replacement sword, you know.
Meta Knight- ... I hate you so much right now.
King Dedede- Anyway, allow me to introduce our guest audience member! He’s fast, he’s cool, but he’s not blue... he’s red! Please welcome the Red Scout from TF2!
Scout- All right... I feel nervous...
Meta Knight- Don’t be. Let’s get this Interview underway! Dedede and I will interview the ugly witch first!
Cackletta- Hey! I resemble that remark!
King Dedede- So, what were your motives in Superstar Saga?
Cackletta- I wanted to rule over the Beanbean Kingdom! It was too peaceful to be too much of a threat!
Meta Knight- And yet, you couldn’t stop two fat Italian plumbers from wrecking your plan? That’s lame in my book.
Cackletta- How was I supposed to know that they were a threat? They didn’t look threatening!
King Dedede- How did you build the Peach Bots? Were they yours?
Cackletta- Yes! I built them with some help from Fawful, but all he did was give them those odd eyes!
Fawful- When is the interviewing of Fawful that the Penguin King of the Land of Dreams promised?
King Dedede- Soon, I can assure you. Now, we’ve heard that you are Queen Bean’s sister! Is it true?
Cackletta- Of course not! Who on Plit told you two?!
Meta Knight- We heard it from a reliable source...
Cackletta- It’s nothing but a rumor! And it isn’t true!
King Dedede- Why do you ride on that odd-looking rocking chair?
Cackletta- I’m old! Plus, it makes great transportation!
King Dedede- How did you disguise yourself as Lady Lima?
Cackletta- With... magic!
King Dedede- Or cheap Special Effects...
Cackletta- Just get on with it!
King Dedede- It’s time for audience questions! Seat 4!
Boo- Can you fly without your chair?
Cackletta- As a matter of fact, no! I can only fly using my chair.
Meta Knight- Then how did you hover into the studio?
Cackletta- With... magic!
King Dedede- That had better not become a running gag! Seat 39!
Prince Peasley- How on earth are you alive?! I thought Mario and Luigi killed you!
Cackletta- I came back to life with... magic!
King Dedede- Give him a proper answer, or I’ll feed you to Kirby!
Cackletta- Eep! Okay! Fawful found a resurrection spellbook in Woohoo University, which managed to bring my body back to life! As for my soul, Fawful put it in a jar, ready to be released into my body!
King Dedede- Do you have a question, Red Scout?
Scout- Yeah! Why did you possess Bowser? He’s a stupid turtle!
Lemmy- Don’t call my dad stupid!
Cackletta- Well, I needed a suitable host for my soul to go in! Bowser was perfect for the job it needed to do!
King Dedede- And now, Meta Knight will interview Fawful!
Meta Knight What?! You’re supposed to do this Interview with me!
King Dedede- Sorry, but I’ve got business to deal with!
King Dedede runs out of the studio, laughing.
Meta Knight- ... Right. Hello Fawful.
Fawful- Fawful says hello to the Knight with the Meta!
Meta Knight- Why do you always talk like that?
Fawful- I had been given it when I was born!
Meta Knight- Okay...
Meanwhile...
King Dedede- So, when am I getting my free Cola?
Kirby- Never!
King Dedede- ARGH! Give me my free Cola!
Kirby- No! You can have some Chocolate!
King Dedede- Yay!
Back in the studio...
Meta Knight- So, how did you go from sidekick to shop owner, and from shop owner to a real villain?
Fawful- When Mistress Cackletta kicked the bucket of doom, I was heartbroken. I went to the ground of the Under and ran a shop there! When I had lots of money, I bought clothes of the stylish and used my greatness to create an army... of DOOM!
Meta Knight- Interesting! Does that mean that you made all of the robots in Peach’s Castle?
Fawful- Yes! Fawful made the robots with his bare hands, but they now feel like sandpaper.
Kirby enters the studio, with King Dedede chasing him! His eyes are bloodshot.
King Dedede- CHOCOLATE!
Kirby- Help me! PLEASE!
Meta Knight- *sigh*
Meta Knight pulls a conveniently placed switch that releases Heavy Lobster from Kirby Super Star Ultra!
King Dedede- CHOC- Huh?
Heavy Lobster- TARGET IN RANGE. COMMENCING ATTACK.
King Dedede- OH NO!
Heavy Lobster charges at King Dedede. In the foreground, Meta Knight, Kirby, and Fawful are sitting on chairs.
Meta Knight- Now that he’s out of our hair...
Kirby- We can get on with this!
Meta Knight- We? Sorry, but you’re not doing this interview with me!
Meta Knight whacks Kirby with his sword, as if he was a tennis ball!
Kirby- I’ll be back!...
Meta Knight- So, if you created the robots, did you create the minions too?
Fawful- Fawful hypnotized the King of the Koopa’s minions, but some were genetically made.
Meta Knight- Did it feel nice to be a proper villain in Bowser’s Inside Story?
Fawful- Yes! Fawful has now got a reputation!
Meta Knight- A bad reputation?
Fawful- I HAVE FURY! FAWFUL’S REPUTATION IS BETTER THAN YOURS!
Meta Knight- No, it isn’t! Plus, the only thing you’re well known for is that stupid ‘Mustard of your Doom’ speech!
Fawful- ... You got Fawful there. Ask Fawful more questions.
Meta Knight- Is Midbus your creation?
Fawful- No! Midbus is only the bread on my sandwich of doom! He is not of my creating!
Meta Knight- So, you hired him?
Fawful- Yes.
Meta Knight- And so, it’s time for audience questions! Seat 3!
Shy Guy- Did you make your headgear out of an old vacuum?
Fawful- What fink-rat told you that?!
Shy Guy- Him!
The Shy Guy is pointing to Luigi.
Fawful- ... Yes, Fawful did build his headgear out of something that sucks.
Meta Knight- Seat 50!
King Dedede- W-why are y-your glasses s-swirly?
Meta Knight- Get down from there!
King Dedede- No! Shut up!
Heavy Lobster- TARGET’S VOICE RECGOGNITION: CONFIRMED . INITIATING OPERATION: BLAST OFF.
Heavy Lobster fires four rockets...
King Dedede- OH NO! NOT AGAIN!
King Dedede gets blasted out of the studio.
Meta Knight- ... Despite all that, answer the question.
Fawful- The glasses are clear, but my eyes are swirly because of an incident when I was testing my repaired headgear. The explosion damaged my eyes and intelligence!
Meta Knight- Does the Red Scout have another question?
Scout- Yeah! If you resurrected Cackletta, how did you get resurrected?
Fawful- Mistress Cackletta used her magic to resurrect me, as thanks for doing the same to her.
Meta Knight- Well, looks like that’s all we’ve got time for! Join Dedede and me when we interview Bowser!
Waddle Dee- End Transmission!
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