In castle Bleck, Dimentio is tearing through everyone’s rooms...
Dimentio: Where is, where is it, where is it, WHERE IS IT?!
Count Bleck: Why are you so bent out of shape, Dimentio?
(Dimentio gets nervous and start sweating.)
Dimentio: Uh, it’s not like I lost anything…
Nastasia: I have an urgent memo from Lemmy in your inbox. It says the amount of work you have done has gone downhill so you need to get in an Interview sooner or later…
Dimention: I’m busy, so YOU do it, Nastasia! Ciao!
(He teleports them all away into Dimension D. Dimentio starts looking through Mimi’s stuff.)
Dimentio: I can’t believe I misplaced the stupid book! It’s not like I have all those stories memorized! Huh, Mimi's new diary...
(In Dimension D studio…)
Nastasia: Gee, I’ve never been in charge of anything… I’m usually just a secretary. Well anyways, welcome, Audience, to Lemmy’s Interview Show, sponsored by Lemmy’s Fun Fic.
Lemmy: The most fan fiction in any one place on the Web!
Nastasia: Please welcome uh… Waluigi?
Waluigi: Waluigi #1! Heh heh heh! Time for my ten minutes of faaaaa…
(Waluigi stares at Nastasia with hearts in his eyes. He quickly runs up to her, kneels, holds out a bouquet of roses with one hand, and grabs Nastasia’s hand with the other.)
Waluigi: Waluigi is your destiny, my precious…
Nastasia: Uh…
(O’Chunks tries to ram into Waluigi but Count Bleck restrains him to the floor with a lot of chains.)
O’Chunks: Let me hurt ‘im! Just a wee bit, Count!
Natasia: Well, question 1: Are you really a scaredy-cat as you are portrayed around Lemmy’s Land?
Waluigi: For you, my love, I will answer anything! And no I am not! I’ve been involved in so many dangerous situations in the games. If I always hang around with a fat guy that could blow any minute, does it look like I could be afraid of anything else?
Nastasia: Question 2: How did you get ahold of Waluigi’s Island (from Mario Party 3)? Is it even a real place?
Waluigi: Huh? What do you mean by that?
Nastasia: Well, you know… All the party boards were practically cardboard since you guys were transported inside the party box.
Waluigi: Well Waluigi’s Island was actually a deserted wasteland. I was blown all the way there when Wario came back from a bean-eating contest. Who would hold such a stupid contest?! Anywho, the reason it was featured in Mario Party 3 is because the Millennium Star needed one more board and randomly chose my island. I was furious at my island turning into cardboard so I stole the Mischief Stamp.
Nastasia: Question 3: How’d you get so tall?
Waluigi: Uh, actually Wario puts me on a rack to make me even taller…
Nastasia: Time for the age-old question: Are you Wario’s brother?
(Waluigi starts sweating a lot…)
Nastasia: Well? You said you would answer me anything…
Waluigi: Uhhh… Well it’s quite controversial through regions, you see… Well all I’ll say is he refers to me as his brother… but he still regularly beats me up for making stupid mistakes.
Nastasia: Question 5: Will you let go of my hand?
Waluigi: Never!
Nastasia: Well, seat DOJOOWNER.
Jinx: Why did you steal the music keys (in Mario DDR)?
Waluigi: I was going to use them to hypnotize the world with my fancy footsteps so they would respect me more!
Nastasia: Seat PENGUINMEAL!
Cheep Cheep: How come you only appeared as an Assist Trophy in Brawl?
Waluigi: When I tried registering to be in the tournament they had a weight check on me and found I was 64 pounds underweight! So they cut a deal with me so I could still be able to fight. I have no real complaints.
Nastasia: Seat GREENMACHINE.
Luigi: Do you have a crush on Daisy?
Waluigi: Not anymore!
Nastasia: This is getting really disturbing… Seat ADMIREDBOO!
Bow: What’s it like living with Wario?
Waluigi: You just had to ask! It’s terrible. The place smells like garlic breath, fart, and sweaty socks! I have to constantly fetch him food ‘cause sometimes he gets stuck in his chair and can’t get out, he hangs me on the rack to grow, and just for kicks he just stands still and watches me have my uh… “Waluigi” moments… Oh, and once he entered me in a beauty completion but it turned out to be a dog show!
Nastasia: Okay, getting really disturbing. Seat BIGUGLYCHEATER.
Wario: Waluigi, I need more potato chips!
Nastasia: A question, please.
Wario: Fine! What is Luigi to you?
Waluigi: Normally I would hate him, but he can live in his dusty old mansion for all I care. I found a new meaning in life…
(Waluigi reaches into his pocket and takes out a wedding ring.)
Nastasia: Oh boy…
O’Chunks: ROOOAAARRR!!!
(O’Chunks breaks free of his chains and tackles Waluigi in a blink of an eye. They get into a fight off-screen.)
Nastasia: Wait, O’Chunks! Remember what Dimentio said about beating up interviewees?
Count Bleck: Something about not before you end transmission. So end it!
(Transmission terminated!)
Whoops! You're not logged in! |