Lemmy: Welcome to Lemmy's Interview Show!
Fireball: I thought we agreed last time you would get some new material?
Lemmy: Have you ever tried running a website? You're too busy to write new material.
Fireball: Then get a guy to do it for you.
Lemmy: I'm too busy.
Fireball: Bad excuse.
Kroshi: Well, who is the unlucky- uh... I mean, lucky interviewee this time, Fireball?
Fireball: I'm glad you asked, because it’s...
Kroshi: ...
Fireball: ...
Kroshi: You don't know, do you?
Fireball: Not a clue.
Mario: You could always interview me.
Fireball: No.
Wario: You could interview me, everything about me is exciting!
Fireball: No.
Wario: Well, can I help you interview?
Fireball: You might as well; there have been complaints about you stealing wallets, I can keep an eye on you up here.
Wario: It’s not my fault they have their wallets wide open, ready to be stolen.
Kroshi: So, how are you going to decide who to interview?
Fireball: Easy.
(He snaps his fingers and receives a piece of paper)
Fireball: Bob-omb.
Lemmy: Wait, you got that random guy who gives you the piece of paper that tells you who you're going to interview?
Fireball: Yeah.
Lemmy: Doesn't that cost extra money?
Fireball: I figured it was worth it. Not everyone has a random guy who gives you a piece of paper that tells you who you're going to interview.
Lemmy: I could just get you an interviewee for free!
Fireball: Yeah, but I like the other guy better.
Lemmy: How much did it cost you to get him back?
Fireball: A lot.
Wario: Don't worry, I'll steal extra wallets... but it’s going to cost you.
Fireball: How much?
Wario: Your wallet.
Fireball: Sounds fair enough.
Wario: Really?
Fireball: No.
Wario: Way to rain on my parade.
Bob-omb: Shouldn't we get this Interview on with?
Fireball: Be patient.
Bob-omb: Just interview me-
Fireball: I said be patient.
Bob-omb: ...
Fireball: ...
Bob-omb: That’s it, I'm going to explode!
Fireball: Woah, woah, woah, settle down. Fine, just for you, we'll start the Interview now.
Bob-omb: Thank you.
Wario: I want to ask a question!
Fireball: Go for it.
Wario: You could have just said "sure."
Fireball: Meh.
Wario: All right then, first question, why is Big Bob-omb the king? What makes him so special?
Bob-omb: He's only the king because he is big and has a ‘stache.
Fireball: Who decided to make him king?
Bob-omb: The important Bob-ombs had a meeting and voted for who should be the Bob-omb King.
Wario: It was probably rigged for him to win.
Big Bob-omb: No, I just bribed them.
Wario: That makes sense too... But how would you get the money to pay them off... Hmm...
Big Bob-omb: It’s easy to steal- I mean... selling Koopa Cola?
Fireball: That sounds really made up, but I'll believe you. Now on with the next question, what happens when you blow up?
Bob-omb: We come back, in a different area though. I can't tell you where, that would be breaking the Bob-omb Code.
Fireball: What happens if you do tell someone?
Bob-omb: I... don't know. I'm pretty sure they get some Bob-omb Agents and lock them up.
Wario: You guys have Bob-omb Agents?
Bob-omb: Yeah.
Wario: Sounds cool, I should steal me one of them.
Bob-omb: You can't steal a person.
Wario: Just watch me... whenever I find the time to do it, though.
Waluigi: Yeah, he’s too busy eating pizza and watching The Price is Right.
Wario: Hey, I'll kick you out of the house!
Waluigi: You don't have the guts!
Wario: Just watch me... whenever I find the time to do it, though.
Fireball: Wario, get to asking the next question.
Wario: Oh yeah, I forgot... Stupid Waluigi. Next question, how do you guys pick up stuff? You have no hands.
Bob-omb: We have no ears or mouth either.
Wario: Oh yeah, hahaha. You totally made me forget what we were talking about.... Wait, now I remember. Answer the question.
Bob-omb: Telekinesis.
Wario: Ooooooooohhhhhhhhh... Can you steal it?
Bob-omb: Uh... no.
Wario: Can you eat it?
Bob-omb: No.
Wario: I've lost all interest in telekinesis.
Bob-omb: You can learn it, after lots of hard training, maybe even a montage.
Wario: Bah, sounds like too much work.
Fireball: All right then, do Shroob-ombs have any relation to you Bob-ombs?
Bob-omb: No. The Shroobs just took a regular Bob-omb and formed their own Bob-omb.
Fireball: All right then. Ask the final question, Wario, then we'll go to the audience for questions.
Wario: How come Big Bob-omb has hands, and you guys don't?
Bob-omb: Big Bob-omb is allied with Bowser; Bowser added the hands so he could have a better chance of beating Mario.
Mario: Which he totally didn't do.
Big Bob-omb: Hey, shut up!
Mario: Make me!
Big Bob-omb: Maybe I will!
Mario: You probably won't!
Big Bob-omb: You’re... right.
Mario: It's-a-me, Mario!
Fireball: That was fairly random.
Mario: It was meant to be.
Wario: Genius.
Fireball: All right, audience questions, seat 89.
Luigi: So, who do the Bob-ombs work for?
Bob-omb: Well, most did work for Wart, then when Wart got defeated, most went to work for Bowser instead. Others decided not to work for Bowser anymore, and went to live elsewhere.
Wario: Seat 0.
Fireball: We don't have a seat 0.
Wario: What? I'm very outraged. This is Lemmy's fault.
Lemmy: Why would you want a seat 0?
Fireball: Who wouldn't?
Lemmy: Me.
Wario: Suuurrrreeee. Seat 263.
Monty Mole: Can you do anything else, other than blow up?
Bob-omb: Well, we can ram into whoever we’re facing, but other than exploding, that’s about it.
Wario: Whahaha, you guys are weak!
Bob-omb: I can give you an example of an explosion, as you as the target.
Wario: Whaha- uh... I'm good.
Bob-omb: That’s what I thought.
Fireball: Seat 101.
Yoshi: Yoshi wonder what makes you blow up?
Bob-omb: It depends on what our emotion level is. Let’s say I'm really mad over something, I'm going to blow. That, or I just make myself blow up. Or someone may light my fuse.
Wario: If I stole your wallet, would you blow up?
Bob-omb: It all depends on how much money I have.
Wario: A lot.
Bob-omb: Then yes.
Wario: Ah.
Kroshi: Random!
Fireball: Woah, that was very random.
Wario: Seat 8.
Mario: How come when I pick up Bob-ombs, their fuse goes off?
Bob-omb: Probably because they’re mad you picked them up; and if they’re with Big Bob-omb or Bowser, they make their fuse go off.
Mario: Mean.
Bob-omb: You're the mean one for picking them up.
Mario: Still... mean.
Fireball: Last seat, seat 356.
Big Bob-omb: How come most Bob-ombs left my army?
Bowser: You mean, MY army.
Big Bob-omb: Whatever.
Bob-omb: You treat us bad, need I say more?
Big Bob-omb: ... I still don't understand why most left m-
Bowser: My army!
Big Bob-omb: Whatever.
(All of a sudden, the power in the studio goes off)
Fireball: Lemmy, have you stopped paying the electricity bills?
Lemmy: It should be you who pays for it.
Fireball: Kroshi?
Kroshi: It should be.
Wario: Don't worry, I bring a candle to all of your Interviews in case something like this happens.
(Wario lights the candle.)
Big Bob-omb: Wait, where did my wallet go to?
Wario: King of Bombs... Hmm, it fits the card.
Big Bob-omb: Hey! Give me back my wallet!
Wario: Uh oh!
Fireball: Uh, you shouldn't go near the candle-
(BOOM)
(…)
Kroshi: The whole studio BLEW UP!
Fireball: This is what happens when you play with bombs.
Lemmy: Uh... this is going to cost a lot.
Fireball: Ha, you got ash all over you!
Lemmy: So do you...
Fireball: So...
Lemmy: Never mind...
Fireball: Now what?
Kroshi: End transmission.
Fireball: Oh yeah. End transmission.
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