(In pursuit of the airship, Mario, Luigi, and the two Toads come across a Paratroopa. As it bounce-charges towards them, the quartet scatter, leaving Luigi to be pursued by the Paratroopa. Luigi misses a jump and starts falling down a pit. The Paratroopa leaps, ready to hit Luigi hard on the head, and in doing so falls for the green-garbed one's plan. Luigi finds purchase on the edge of the pit, and manages to jump across and land safely on the other side. Unfortunately for the Paratroopa, he is not as quick on his feet and falls down the pit.)
(At the bottom of a pit, a certain Dry Bones in a black robe awaits. In funeral bell tones, he addresses the recently departed Paratroopa.)
Death of Koopas: *sigh* And what, exactly, were you thinking with that maneuver?
Ambitious Paratroopa: Well, I planned to tackle Luigi as I landed on him, and take him out. I'd be a glorious hero, one who took out one of the Mario Brothers!
Death of Koopas: I was more concerned with why you did not simply fly out of the pit.
Ambitious Paratroopa: Oh, I couldn't. Those wings were weak because their magic was running out.
Death of Koopas: Magic.
Ambitious Koopa: Well, yeah. You know? A wing spell so Koopas can fly.
Death of Koopas: I do not have much experience with magic. I am immune. So you had a wing spell, and it was running out.
Ambitious Koopa: Yeah. Normally we're given a "booster spell" so they stay longer, but in conflicts like this one-
Death of Koopas: An entire army against what appears to be less than ten people.
Ambitious Koopa (ignoring this) -our resources are stretched too thin.
Death of Koopas: So Paratroopas are sent out into conflict with wings that they will soon lose. I suppose that is why some of them bounce while others actually take to the sky?
Ambitious Koopa: Yeah, pretty much. Those lucky enough to fly are those who were given their wings latest, obviously.
Death of Koopas: It stands to reason. But why do these wings fall off at the drop of a hat? Or, I suppose, at the drop of a plumber?
Ambitious Koopa: Terrible system, isn't it? In order to conserve energy, Magikoopas are instructed to use weaker spells. Quantity not quality, right? Well, because of this, our wings fall off with a hard enough knock! At least it isn't painful or anything.
Death of Koopas: But stronger spells would make wings that don't fall off so easily…
Ambitious Koopa: Dude, spells exist for wings that won't fall off?
Death of Koopas: All this talk of spells and magic... Are there no more natural Paratroopas, then?
Ambitious Paratroopa: Oh, there are. They just... tend to avoid serving under Bowser.
Death of Koopas: No doubt out of protest for his abysmal treatment of their magically enhanced brethren.
Ambitious Paratroopa: Hmm... Kinda. They'd just feel really guilty about the fact that their wings are just so much better than what the rest of us get.
Death of Koopas: How noble.
Ambitious Paratroopa: And they're probably scared that they'll get beat up by jealous Koopas with worse wings.
Death of Koopas: How intelligent. What do these non-serving Paratroopas do?
Ambitious Paratroopa: Well, since service is compulsory for all Koopa Kingdom subjects, they get mixed in with the rebels.
Death of Koopas: And...
Ambitious Paratroopa: Oh, they all go and live as refugees. Mostly they turn full traitor and head to the Mushroom Kingdom.
Death of Koopas: Oh dear, I know that name.
Ambitious Paratroopa: Hah! Sworn enemy of the Koopa Kingdom forever! Or so they think.
Death of Koopas: And this is not the case?
Ambitious Paratroopa: No way! When this war is over, we'll wipe them off the map, level their cities, and burn all they have to the ground! It's hard to be an enemy when all that's left is burning ruins.
Death of Koopas: And yet, the Koopa Kingdom has seemingly kept it up for the last twenty years...
Ambitious Paratroopa: Minor setback, shouldn't you know? We'll rise up and take down the hated fungi yet.
Death of Koopas: It is not for me to say.
(The door to the afterlife appears.)
Death of Koopas: I'm afraid it's time for you to go.
Ambitious Paratroopa: All right, time to be reincarnated so I can fight for my country again!
(The ambitious Paratroopa enters the door, which fades away.)
Death of Koopas: It's not for me to say. But most only get one life to give for their country…
Whoops! You're not logged in! |