Lakitu: 10 minutes ‘til showtime.
Koopa Troopa: We’ve got the new catchphrase.
Toadette: What is it?
Koopa Troopa: Bring the others so they know.
Toadette: ETM!!! Shy B!!! Come here please!!!
ETM and Shy B: What?
Koopa Troopa: We have the new catchphrase.
ETM and Shy B: Oh!
Koopa Troopa: Here it is.
(He shows it to them )
All 3: Nice!
Lakitu: Five minutes!
Shy B: Who are we interviewing today?
Toadette: Princess Shroob.
Shy B: Cool.
Lakitu: Two minutes!
ETM: We’d better get going onstage.
Meanwhile on an action-packed stage...
TES interviews are the best! They’re masters at everything! Even a test! YAY!!!
Toadette: Welcome to TES Interviews, on...
Lemmy: LEMMY’S INTERVIEW SHOW!!!
Toadette: Toady we’ll be interviewing Princess Shroob.
(Princess Shroob walks in.)
Princess Shroob: !!Q#$%$%!%Q$%##%%###$^^&^$^_^/>&-_=+*/+&*%<#^$&%!!!
Toadette and ETM: HUH?!
Shy B: She’s speaking Shroobish. Try this.
(He hits her with a beam.)
Shy B: Now she will only speak English.
Princess Shroob: I wanna speak Shroobish, dimwits!!!
Shy B: Well... TOO BAD. We all want things. I want my own train, but General Guy says “nooo”. >=(
Toadette: Let’s just start the Interview.
Princess Shroob: FINE.
Shy B: Question one, why are you such a crab right now? T_T
Princess Shroob: BECAUSE I CAN BE!
Elisa the Mii: What’s in that freaky cup you’re always drinking out of?
Princess Shroob: It’s my beauty juice. I look really ugly without it.
Elisa the Mii: Really?
(Princess Shroob starts turning pale and gets all wrinkly.)
Elisa the Mii: ... She wasn’t lying.
(A random Shroob waiter brings Princess Shroob a cup. She drinks it and she looks fit and young again.)
Toadette: Why did you choose to attack the Mushroom Kingdom out of all places?
Princess Shroob: Because we love Super Mushrooms! We import them every month!
Toadette: How?
Princess Shroob: We stole the second magic chest from Shooting Star Summit and tricked Toadsworth into putting Mushrooms into the magic chest at Peach’s Castle.
Toadette: AUDIENCE TIME! Seat H-I-G-U-R-A-S-H-I!
Mion Sonozaki: What happened to the Shroobs after Mario and the rest beat you guys?
Princess Shroob: We actually turned into Poison Mushrooms. So technically we’re still around. >=3
Shy B: Seat K-A-B-O-O-M!
Big Bob-omb: Why did you copy us by making Shroob-ombs?
Princess Shroob: We didn’t copy them. Shroob-ombs are the Shroob equivalent of Bob-ombs. There have always been Shroob-ombs on our planet. Get your facts straight! >=(
Elisa the Mii: Last question! Seat O-M-O-C-H-I-K-A-E-R-I-I
Rena Ryuugu: HAUUU! You’re so... a-a-ADOWABLE! I WANNA TAKE YOU HOME WITH ME!!!
Princess Shroob: NOOOOOOO!!!
(Rena grabs Princess Shroob and takes her home, saying “Hauu! You’re so ADOWABLE!” the whole way)
Toadette: ... I guess that’s it. END TRANSMISSION!
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