Spiker: Hello, and welcome to-
Earth Crystal: Shake!!!
Spiker: Um, hi?
Lemmy: He is here ‘cause I sentenced him to stay with you! I might tell Fire and Water Crystal to go to Phantos67 and some other guy...
Spiker: So Earthy here will shake when I least expe-
Earth Crystal: Shake!!!
Spiker: Of course...
Blue: Who shall we interview today?
Bonetail: Interview a dead person!
Spiker: That’s up to the magic dice!
(Spiker rolls the dice and it lands on Koopatrol.)
Spiker: Well, I guess-
Earth Crystal: Shake!!!
Spiker: -we will-
Earth Crystal: Shake!!!
Spiker: -interview!
(There is silence.)
Spiker: Koopatrol?
Earth Crystal: Shake!!!
Koopatrol: Um, hi everyone!
Spiker: All right, question one, what games have you appeared in?
Koopatrol: All the Paper Mario games.
Spiker: Okay, question two, how did you get your armor?
Koopatrol: Well, most of us had to be a servant of the Koopalings and served them for one year. After that, they signed a slip saying we can become Koopatrols!
Bonetail: Cool, like a Hammer Bro story!
Koopatrol: Well, our rank in the Paper Mario games is slightly higher.
Blue: Splee! Blueberry muffin?
Koopatrol: I am allergic to-
Blue: YOU MUST DIE!!!
(Blue starts to run after Koopatrol, but Bonetail eats him and puts him in his ribcage.)
Bonetail: You can kill him after the Interview!
Blue: Fine...
Spiker: GETTING BACK ON TOPIC-
Earth Crystal: Shake!!!
Spiker: -_-’ Question three, how come you haven’t appeared in other games?
Koopatrol: Um, I guess we usually chill out in the Paper World. It’s hard work trying to cross the border of non-paper!
Spiker: Hey! That’s like Blue’s story of moving from Yoshi’s Island to Lemmy’s Land!
Blue: Those were dark times...
Bonetail: *gasp* I am holding an illegal im-
Blue: I AM NOT ILLEGAL! I had to pay a lot of money to get into Lemmy’s Land!
Spiker: What are you talking about? It’s free to get in and you don’t even need passports!
Blue: SO THAT SHADY KOOPA WAS REALLY SHADY!!! I’LL KILL HIM IF WE INTERVIEW HIM!!!
Spiker: Question four, what is a Koopatrol’s attack?
Koopatrol: I can call my friends and they can come and help out, and I can go into my shell and spin around a lot and hit Mario.
Spiker: Cool, time for audience questions! SEATIPITYDAFOOL!!!
Mr. T: Why do you wear all that armor on you?! And I pity da fool!!!
Last Goomba: (continuing Mr. T’s line) -who hates Last Goomba!
(Mr. T beats up Last Goomba.)
Koopatrol: ‘Cause we needed the defense and HP boost. Every shell and armor gives a boost, like Bowser’s, who got 99 HP in Paper Mario.
Spiker: I got over 9,000 HP! ‘Cause of my shell and my Youtube sense!
Bonetail: SEAT SPIKYKOOPAFROMOTHERGAMES!!!
Spike Koopa: What is with the spike on your head?
Spiker: Hi Brother!
Koopatrol: -_- Well anyway, it’s ‘cause like Spiky Goombas, who got some protection from Mario’s shoe with their hat, so Bowser gave us a spike on our helmets.
Spiker: SEAT DINOHELPERTOMARIO!!!
Yoshi: Does Koopatrol wear contacts? Yoshi noticed that you guys don’t wear them unlike most Koopas.
Koopatrol: Well, hey, we wear nothing. You have to have good vision when wearing a helmet, which we wear all day, so we don’t wear shades. Anyway, look at Magikoopas and the Hammer Bros, they don’t wear anything.
Spiker: True... Anyway, that’s all the time we have tomorrow! I mean today, I mean last week! We always have time here!
Light blue: Yeah, why do we have time?
Last Goomba: ‘Cause the writer is always right!
Spiker: Yeah, I am always right!
Bonetail: Okay Blue, you can go kill Koopatrol!
(Bonetail lets out Blue and Blue proceeds to beat Koopatrol to a bloody pulp.)
Spiker: Wow, that was mean-
Earth Crystal: Shake!!!
Spiker: Pointy objects!!!
Earth Crystal: Shake!!!
Spiker: Pointy objects!!!
Earth Crystal: Shake!!!
Spiker: Curses! My line does not work!!!
Light Blue: Pointy objects?
Spiker: Yeah, I live up to my name, since I am a general now!
Last Goomba: I thought James said you were a gym teacher?
Spiker: That was a parttime job! Back in SMB3, every Koopa in the Koopa army took a break waiting for SMW and I was bored, so I went and yelled at people!
Blue: Makes sense.
James Issac Koopa: I AM IMPORTANT TO THIS SHOW!!!
(A big hand takes James and throws him into another studio.)
WRITER: OKAY SPIKER, CONTINUE WITH YOUR LINES...
Spiker: Pointy objects!!!
WRITER: ...
Spiker: Um, I hate Wario for killing Spike Koopa?
WRITER: ...
Spiker: Um, my magic dice says to end transmission?
WRITER: GOOD!
(Transmission ended)
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