BANDY ANDY AND FAWFUL KOOPA interview KOOPATROL
 
By Fawful Koopa and Bandy Andy

Fawful: Trolls!

Lemmy: Shaddup. Didn't I lock you in a closet?

Fawful: That nice troll set me free!

(The camera pans over to a random Koopatrol.)

Koopatrol: Umm... Who are you people?

Fawful: Because you saved me, I am going to give you an amazing gift: publicity!

Koopatrol: W-wait- Is that a camera? I'm horribly stagefrig-

(The Koopatrol faints.)

Fawful: (looking at Lemmy) You killed him?! That's not nice.

Lemmy: Silence! For that, I will make you do a co-op Interview.

Fawful: But you were the one who killed-

Lemmy: Silence!

(Suddenly, Bandy Andy flies through the wall.)

Bandy Andy: Curse you, Swiper!

Lemmy: You're paying for that!

Bandy Andy: How about instead, I do an Interview with this Paratroopa?

Lemmy: Great idea!

Fawful: But I did not get a say in this! I do not like getting quizzed

Lemmy: Silence, nonbeliever!

Fawful: ...

Bandy Andy: Why don't we interview that Koopatrol?

Fawful: Trolls!

(The Koopatrol slowly wakes up.)

Lemmy: Be interviewed. NAO

Koopatrol: C-camera? N-no sir. I-I-I'm afraid I'll- Lemmy: 50 bucks for ya if you do it

Koopatrol: Wow, my stage fright's been replaced with a totally new feeling! What is it?

Lemmy: Richness. Now ask and answer questions, guys.

Koopatrol: But I'm a gir-

Fawful: How do you become a Koopatrol?

Koopatrol: Well, I-

Fawful: Where did you get that armor?

Koopatrol: First let me answer the other-

Fawful: Why was your vision so bad in Paper Mario?

Koopatrol: LIKE I WAS SAYING-

Fawful: Wha-

Koopatrol: SHUT UP AND LET ME ANSWER!

Fawful: Meep.

Koopatrol: To answer your first question, you must be one of Bowser's most elite soldiers for him to allow you to have armor, as it costs a lot. That is all that's different about us, though. Now let that Bandit ask a question.

Bandy Andy: Very well. What kind of Koopas are Koopatrols?

Koopatrol: Any kind. We just have to be strong enough for the pricy armor.

Bandy Andy: What is the Koopa rank chain?

Koopatrol: Well, at the lowest is your normal Koopa, then there are Dark and Shady Koopa's, then us Koopatrols, and then Lakitus, then Hammer Bros, then at the top are Magikoopas.

Bandy: Why do Koopatrols have more HP than normal Koopas?.

Koopatrol: The armor.

Bandy Andy: Shouldn't that just increase defense?

Koopatrol: Did I mention this is Magic Armor? Kamek has madskillz with a piece of metal, enough to make it bless endurance. That's why there are so few Koopatrols, it costs a lot to get the armor

Bandy Andy: How can girls become Koopatrols? Shouldn't boys be the only ones who can become Koopatrols?

Koopatrol: That's just biased! I'm better than any boy I know!

Bandy Andy: ... Turning over to you, Fawful.

Fawful: Trolls!

Koopatrol: No.

Fawful: Why are you called a Koopatrol, then?

Koopatrol: It's a pun on "Koopa" and "patrol", k? We got that name since we guard the castle on our patrols.

Bandy Andy: What are Dark Koopatrols?

Koopatrol: Magically enhanced normal Koopatrols.

Bandy Andy: Judging by my worthless previous questions, I'm thinking there are no Paratroopatrols.

Koopatrol: You think wrong. Kamek, with his-

Everyone: Madskillz.

Koopatrol: -made some prototype armor for some Paratroopatrols. However, unintentionally Mario lowered thee training ground with all the Paratroopatrols into the lava.

Bandy Andy: Fawful, I think that it's your turn. Fawful: Thinking smells. Trolls don't smell. Hyper Goombas drive sun chariots.

Koopatrol: Wha-what?

Fawful: Trolls! Koopatrol: How about I answer that third question you so rudely cut me off by asking me. This armor, in order to protect our heads, also limits our peripheral vision

Fawful: Trolls!

Koopatrol: Seriously. Shut up.

Fawful: No. Audience questions. Seat 47,939,483,438,487,438,474,738,743.

Bandy Andy: I don't think that number seat is in the studio.

Fawful: Seat 35. Oh yeah, and trolls!

Boomerang Bro: If your armor is so heavy, then how do you spin so fast? Oh, and do you wanna go out for dinner?

Koopatrol: ... Not answering the second question. We spin so fast because of rocket boosters on our shells.

Bandy Andy: Seat 78.

Larry: Why are you only in the Paper Mario series?

Koopatrol: After the Paper Mario series, we quit being evil, and became good. So we abandoned the armor and became peaceful Koopas. That is, besides me. h Have graduated to being a Magikoopa, and will receive my wand and robe soon. The reason I am upgrading to Magikoopa so quick is because Kamek is very impressed with my talents.

Bandy Andy: Fawful, are you ready?

Fawful: Yes.

Together: END TRANSMISSION.

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