Hyper Goomba: Hyper Hyper Hyper Hyper Hyper Hyper Hyper Hyper Hyper Hyper!
Fawful: They pay me too little…
Boom: You said that last Interview!
Fawful: And I will keep on sayng it until I get a raise!
Boom: You are crazy. Lemmy is a miser.
Fawful: I know he acts like one to me, but…
(Lemmy is seen tossing money over fields of happiness.)
Boom: Oh. Let’s get this show on the road!
Hyper Goomba: Ca-FFEINE
Boom: They do you pay you too little. So, H Goomba, what is your favorite food?
H. Goomba: Ca-FFEINE!
Boom: Really?
H. Goomba: Yes, you are quite correct- no wait, here’s what Lemmy told me to say. Ahh… CHEEZEMEAT!
(Lemmy whistles.)
Fawful: How do you charge up your attack power?
H Goomba: Well, we stockpile on sugar, reducing our intelligence but greatly increasing our strength. When we’re all hyper, we actually hit Mario multiple times, but it’s so fast, it looks like one attack.
Lemmy: Hey, you aren’t saying CONKER KA-CHING FLUFFBALL! I paid you 2,000 coins to do that!
Boom: He paid you 2,000 coins to torture Fawful?
H. Goomba: Yes. Sorry I forgot my lines, I’ll remember them next time!
Lemmy: You forgot them again! You’re fired!
H. Goomba: Fawful, because you got me fired, I’m gonna torture you.
Fawful: Lemmy, rehire him!
Lemmy: No, my plan worked!
Boom: So, H Goomba, where do you live?
H. Goomba: Because Lemmy is using me for his own personal gain, I will answer that. Any place abandoned by a previous society, like Twilight Trail and Gusty Gulch.
Fawful: (Hey, only I’m allowed to abuse people on this show!) Why?
H. Goomba: A while ago a Toad started making racist comments because our skin was green, so we were driven out of town to those societies to live with other weirdoes. Most of them went insane. I’m the only one whose sanity is still in existence!
Boom: I feel like blowing something up. Cue explosion noises!
Shy Guy with microphone: BAM POW WALLOP! BOOM!
Fawful: That’s another reason I need a raise!
Lemmy: Scrub the floor and I’ll raise your salary by one coin.
(Fawful joyously scrubs the dirt of the floor and all the dirty stuff on Plit.)
Boom: While he’s doing that, I’m gonna ask you another question. Why is your skin green?
H. Goomba: We’re the most elite Goombas of Bowser’s troops, he-
Boom: Lemme guess, sprayed you with body paint?
H. Goomba: No. We used to be brown. Like I was saying, he gave us unlimited sugar, which hyped us up. When the Toads were driving us out they gave us Poison Mushrooms. Being as we are also Mushrooms, instead of getting game overed, we turned a sickly green.
Boom: And does that affect your battle skills in any way?
H. Goomba: Well, we don’t need to pull out more sugar and eat it…
Boom: ?
H. Goomba: During our charging move, we barf already consumed sugar and repeat the swallowing process
Boom: EW!
(Boom faints. Fawful finishes wiping.)
Fawful: Why’d you faint? I know you find this stuff appealing!
Boom: Storyline purposes. Y’know, to let you ask a few questions before we blow everyone up for the finale.
Fawful: Oh.
H. Goomba: Umm…
Fawful: Show me a gravity-defying stunt that bends the laws of physics.
(H. Goomba starts hopping on the ceiling.)
Lemmy: How is that even possible?!
H. Goomba: It isn’t.
(Hyper Goomba falls.)
Lemmy: NO! I DON’T WANT ANYONE DIEING HERE. IT’LL STAIN THE FLOORS.
(Lemmy dives and misses.)
Lemmy: End Transmission!
Fawful: That won’t work.
Lemmy: No, ending transmission stops the flow of time-
(H. Goomba is frozen in the air.)
Boom: I don’t like fainting.
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