Nintendo Fan: Today we will interview Jr. Troopa.
Fawful: …
Lemmy: HEY! You forgot to say a line!
Nintendo Fan: What line?
Lemmy: ARGH! I’ll say it.
(He goes onstage and says the line.)
Lemmy: Welcome to MY show, where-
N.F: No, you have it all wrong!
Lemmy: Then YOU say it.
N.F: Fine, I will. Welcome to Nintendo Fan’s Interview Show, where I-
Fawful: I?! You mean US!
N.F: *grumble* FAWFUL and I will be asking questions about the interviewee. Our guest is, JR. TROOPA!
(Rimshot.)
Audience: HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH!
Jr. Troopa: Hey, stop LAUGHING!!!
Roy (seat 26): HAH! Do you REALLY want to interview HIM? I would rather pick somebody else who’s stronger, like Smithy for example!
N.F: I-I don’t really know much about him…
Roy: Huh… He was this guy from Super Mario RPG…
Fawful: ALL OF YOU ARE MAKING ME LOSE MY TEMPER! JUST YOU WAIT, ROY, AND I WILL SHOW YOU HOW MUCH FURYNESS I HAVE! I HAVE FURY!!! I JUST WANTED TO GET STARTING ON THIS FINK-RATTY INTERVIEW, FINK-RAT AUDIENCE!!!
Audience: …
Fawful: Good. I will blow up this studio if somehow you won’t stop screaming in my ear.
Plit: …
Lemmy: … Did he just say a sentence that made sense?!
Fawful: No I didn’t! That was just random, and I will be doing it for the whole Interview.
Lemmy: But why?! You sound funny when you talk weird. The audience might think you’re a comedian.
Audience: NO WE WON’T!
Lemmy: Oh, never mind. Get started already!
Fawful: The first question is, what do you mostly do for the whole day?
Jr. Troopa: My quest is to break, wreck, and make fun of things that people have.
N.F: Come on now, that’s so mean. You really make fun of their belongings?
Jr. Troopa: Yes. I don’t care! Ask me another question, you jerk.
Fawful: At some part of the game, you kissed the ground after you got out of Forever Forest. Is that true?
Jr. Troopa: Nu-uh! That’s completely false!
Fawful: Oh come on! How many of you people has played Paper Mario before?
(About 99 percent of the audience raises their hands.)
Fawful: See? Whoever played the game made you totally hilarious when you said that. I was sure it made you embarrassed when people were laughing at you.
Jr. Troopa: *blush*
N.F: What is your full HP?
Jr. Troopa: My full HP is 70.
N.F: That true?
Jr. Troopa: Yup.
Fawful: Why are you a bully?
Jr. Troopa: When I went to elementary school, mean people were always taking my lunch and stepping on it. For the whole dang day I was hungry and I had nothing to eat. I was starving, I tell ya.
Fawful: Aww, that’s so sad-
Jr. Troopa: HEY! Shut up and ask me another question!
Fawful: Fine. Where’d ya get the wand?
Jr. Troopa: My great, great grandfather gave it to me and I used it when I was training so I could become a master.
N.F: Who trained you?
Jr. Troopa: Kamek, as always.
Fawful: Audience time! Seat 45!
Birdo: Why do you have that spike on your head whenever you turn into your bat form?
Jr. Troopa: I wear it so it can hurt Mario’s feet whenever he jumps on me.
N.F: Seat 20.
Lady Bow: Why do you wear an eggshell?
Jr. Troopa: I wear it to make me look younger, but SOME people think that I’m weaker than I look!
Fawful: Seat 87!
Sushie: Why are you such a bully?
Fawful: HEY! I already asked that question! Weren’t you paying attention?
Sushie: No.
Fawful: … Seat 27.
Wendy: Can I move to another seat?! I hate being next to Roy!
Fawful: Nope, too bad! Hey, we’re running outta time, end transmission!
Wendy: Ugh. Fawful, sometimes, I just-
Fawful: End transmission!
Wendy: I just-
Fawful (singsong): End transmissiooon!
Wendy: JUST FORGET IT!!!
(Wendy smashes the camera.)
TRANSMISSION TERMINATED
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