One random night in 1-up Boo’s studio...
1-up Boo: (singing poorly) Today is a random day in my studio and I’m wondering who to interview neeext!
Vim: …
1-up Boo: (singing) I have done nothing the past three days and I am booored!
Vim: Umm…
1-up Boo: Oh, hey Vim! What are you doing here, planning to destroy me?
Vim: Not today.
1-up Boo: (singing again) Well start setting up my interviewing equipment *pulls out rocket launcher* or eeeelse!
Vim: Where did you get a rocket launcher?!
1-up Boo: It’s the one I had in my last Interview. Now work!
(He fires his rocket launcher at Vim.)
Vim: Pain…
(Vim goes flying into the ceiling.)
Vim: …
1-up Boo: Hey! Don’t just stay there! Get back to work!
(Vim stays there.)
1-up Boo: Hmm…
(1-up Boo looks into the seats where the audience usually is.)
1-up Boo: I need attention!
(He goes floating out of the studio, heading to a weapon shop.)
1-up Boo: Hmm… In order to get an audience I must get Vim out of the ceiling so he can do it for me!
(He grabs a deactivated Bob-omb and goes back to the studio without paying.)
1-up Boo: Okay Vim! Prepare to work!
(He throws the Bob-omb at Vim but it just bounces back.)
1-up Boo: … Curse you, evil store! Why must you sell things that don’t work?!
(Vim falls down from the ceiling.)
Vim: That -ouch- was random.
1-up Boo: Yup. Now tell me how to make this thing work.
(Vim looks at the Bob-omb.)
Vim: … Where did you get that?
1-up Boo: I… um… know a guy. Yeah, that’s it. Now tell me how to get it to work!
Vim: Are you lying?
1-up Boo: WORK!
(Vim simply presses the on button.)
Bob-omb: I’m alive!
1-up Boo: Yep! Now time to use you against Vim.
Vim: Why don’t we interview him instead? You did say you were bored.
1-up Boo: (singing badly once again) That’s a great ideeeea! *pulls out rocket launcher* Now set up my equipment or eeeelse!
(Vim immediately does so.)
1-up Boo: Great!
(He fires at Vim anyway.)
Vim: (while flying off): Sometimes I wonder why I didn’t read that contract he made me sign.
Bob-omb: Errrm…
1-up Boo: Ah yes, so why do most Bob-ombs get mad when they get hit?
Bob-omb: No way am I cooperating.
(1-up Boo pulls out his rocket launcher and aims at him.)
1-up Boo: Don’t make me blast you!
Bob-omb: What I meant to say was let us begin!
1-up Boo: Thought so! Now answer the question!
Bob-omb: We just have a bad temper. So we turn red and prepare to KILL them!
1-up Boo: … Isn’t that a suicide mission?
Bob-omb: What part of BAD TEMPER do you not understand?
1-up Boo: Hey, just sounds stupid to me.
(The Bob-omb’s fuse lights up.)
1-up Boo: Hm, I see you do have a bad temper.
(He blows on the fuse, making it stop.)
1-up Boo: So why is it that Bombette and Bobbery can explode all they want but you guys can’t?
Bob-omb: They have gunpowder inside them, allowing them to explode as much as they want.
1-up Boo: Why-
(Suddenly Vim falls on 1-up Boo.)
1-up Boo: Oof!
Vim: Oooooooouch!
1-up Boo: Vim! I can’t believe you! Disturbing MY Interview?! Shame on you!
Vim: …
1-up Boo: Now disturb me one more time and I’ll… do something bad!
Vim: I’ll just walk away now.
(Vim does so.)
1-up Boo: That’s right, you better run!
Bob-omb: …
1-up Boo: As I was saying, why are all Bob-ombs painted black?
Bob-omb: It’s just the color Big Bob-omb paints us! That’s like asking why Boos are white!
1-up Boo: Temper.
Bob-omb: Grrrr…
(His fuse lights up but 1-up Boo blows on it.)
1-up Boo: What’s with the Bob-ombs in Super Mario Galaxy? Not the activated ones but the ones that are deactivated.
Bob-omb: Are you referring to the ones in Dreadnought Galaxy?
1-up Boo: … I guess so.
Bob-omb: The gear-headed robot guys hated having to clean up all the trash in Dreadnought and they wondered if there was any other way to clean it up. They discovered the Bob-ombs that roamed around and wondered if they could use them to blow up the trash. They made Bob-omb holders and knocked many of the Bob-ombs out, putting a huge amount in each holder.
1-up Boo: … Are you saying they blew up the trash?
Bob-omb: Yes.
1-up Boo: I see. Why are there the pink Bob-ombs in Super Mario 64 that helped Mario?
Bob-omb: I believe those ones are traitors. They saw life of a Bob-omb as stupid and didn’t want to do suicide missions so they decided to sneak away and start a new life. First they changed their color to pink to show that they no longer worked for Big Bob-omb, and they started some cannon company to help Mario defeat Big Bob-omb. TRAITORS!
1-up Boo: Well I’d say it’s time for audience questions! Vi-
Vim: Since I knew you were going to make me get an audience, I rounded one up while you were talking.
1-up Boo: … Seat 8!
Paragoomba: Why aren’t you guys in any Mario sports games?
Bob-omb: If we lost we would probably blow up due to our temper.
1-up Boo: Seat 56.
Koopa: Why are Bob-ombs in Super Mario Bros. 3 blue?
Bob-omb: The tank-like things in that game produced some kind of blue bubblely oil as waste. Since most Bob-ombs don’t pay attention to where they’re going, they all fell in the oil. This dyed the Bob-ombs blue. There also may have been some of the oil in the tank and that got the Bob-ombs that started inside a tank blue.
1-up Boo: Interesting.
Vim: Last question. Seat-
1-up Boo: Who says you get to decide that?!
Vim: I do.
1-up Boo: But you can’t decide-
Bob-omb: Can we just finish this? I want to go home.
1-up Boo: But I got you at a store, so isn’t that your home?
Bob-omb: …
1-up Boo: Hello?
Vim: Seat 839.
Yoshi: Yoshi want to know you feel about having no arms.
Bob-omb: WE HATE IT!!! If we had arms we could just grab Mario and then blow up.
Vim: Well I guess we’re done here.
1-up Boo: … Wow, life in a store. You must have no life.
Bob-omb: Okay that made me mad!
(BOOM!!!)
Vim: Way to go, genius. The whole studio is destroyed.
1-up Boo: Oh be quiet…
Audience: Ouch.
1-up Boo: Vim?
Vim: What?
1-up Boo: When I first made you my servant… I mean assistant, you said you made up the name Vim… Is this true?
Vim: No. I just said that to make you happy.
1-up Boo: So Vim really is your name?
Vim: Yes, Shy Guys never lie.
1-up Boo: I see… Just making sure.
Vim: Well I still hate you.
1-up Boo: Yeah, I know.
...
1-up Boo: Well, it’s time.
(1-up Boo starts coming towards the camera with his rocket launcher.)
(END TRANSMISSION)
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