Toad: Hey! If this is a Goomba-only studio then why am I here?Birby6: Because you’re my favorite character! Even better than Yoshi!
(Just then Yoshi bursts in.)
(Yoshi, Yoshi objects!)
(Birby6 Hey! No Yoshis allowed! Security!)
(Smoke balls soon break in through the window, enveloping the whole studio in smoke.)
Random Goomba: My eyes!
(The Goomba’s eyes then catch on fire and melt away. Nary marines then come in.)
Navy Commander: Okay, which one of you ate my sub sandwich?
Birby6: Uhhh…Yoshi did it! Get him!
(The Navy then beat Yoshi with clubs, baseball bats, and the eyeless Goomba.)
Eyeless Goomba: Why me?!
Birby6: That goes for all you Yoshi lovers out there! *clears throat* Anyway, let’s get to the Interview. Today I interviewed a basic Goomba, which is my favorite enemy!
Goomba: Yay me!
Birby6: First question, why doesn’t our species have arms?
Goomba: Well we did at one point, but as we evolved over time our arms fell off.
Birby6: I see.
Navy Commander: It seems our target didn’t have any sub sandwiches
Birby6: Oh yeah. I forgot about the Navy. Hey Navy! Look at this!
(Birby6 somehow holds up a sub sandwich. Soon all the Navy people are on all fours hanging their tongues out like dogs.)
Birby6: Want this? Then go get it.
(He throws it. The sub sandwich then lands in the street next to the studio with the Navy following it. When they get to the sub sandwich they get in a cartoon cloud fight over the sub sandwich. Yet they don’t notice a garbage truck heading their way.)
Koopa Driver: Holy cow!
Back in the studio...
Birby6: Darn you Goombario! We didn’t get to show the viewers the outcome!
Goombario: But my camera went out!
Birby6: Since when do cameras go out?!
Goombario: When they run out of batteries.
Birby6: Since when do our cameras run on batteries?!
Goombario: Since you spent all our money on Mario Kart Wii!
Briby6: So? It was an impulsive buy! Anyway, we should get the janitor to clean up that mess out on the street.
Janitor Goomba: I’m on it.
(Janitor Goomba goes outside to clean up.)
Birby6: Ok. On with the questions! When did you start working for Bowser?
Goomba: Ever since Goomba King gave in to him. We usually serve under the Koopas, which stinks!
Birby6: I feel your pain, dude. Ok! Audience questions. Seat 831!
Eyeless Goomba: Why am I suddenly the one who gets beaten up around here?
Birby6: Because every story, Scribble, Interview, or any other piece of work must have someone who gets hurt all the time.
Eyeless Goomba: Well it stinks!
Goomba (the one being interviewed) Ah-hem!
Birby6: Oh yeah, the Interview. Seat 618!
A Random Goomba: Why were you ball-shaped in Super Mario World?
Goomba: Because before Super Mario World Bowser made us that shape so he can use us as cannonballs. It didn’t work out, however.
Birby6: How sad… Oh well! Seat 113!
Paragoomba: Why do we flatten when we’re stepped on?
Goomba: Because we’re full of hot air.
Paragoomba: You mean like a whoopee cushion?
Goomba: Why yes. Why did you… Augh!
(Paragoomba gets on the Goomba interviewee and repeatedly jumps on him, causing the Goomba interviewee to make a farting noise when getting flattened.)
Birby6: Hey! You can‘t attack our interviewee
Paragoomba: Make me!
Birby6: Uh… Look! Pancakes!
Paragoomba: Yay! Pancakes!
(The Paragoomba then flies out of one of the broken windows)
Navy Commander: There goes our sub sandwich
Birby6: How did you come back to life?
Navy Commander: Magic
Bill Nye: No! Science!
Dark Koopa: Stop stealing my joke and thunder!
Mr L: The Green Thunder!
Birby6: Ok. This is getting too wacky here. And where are the security Goombas?
Meanwhile...
Security Goomba #1: Got any 8s?
Security Goomba #2: Nope
Security Goomba #1: I always wondered how we’re playing cards without any hands…
Back in the studio...
Birby6: Well that answers my question. Anyway, end transmission.
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