JAMES ISSAC KOOPA interviews DRY BOWSER
 
By Spiker Koopa
James: Hello, and welcome to-

Lemmy: Lemmy’s Interview Show!

James: Yeah, and today, I’ll be interviewing Dry Bowser!

Dry Bowser: Hi everybody!

(A Goomba in the audience cheers.)

James: Where’s the rest of the audience?

Lemmy: They’re at Dark Koopa’s Interview.

James: Don’t worry, I got this.

Meanwhile...

Dark Koopa: So Wario, why do you wear yellow clothes?

Wario: Well it’s-

(James breaks through a wall.)

Dark Koopa: Hey! You can’t do that!

Wario: Yeah! Go through the window. It’s more dramatic!

James: Okay.

(James breaks through a window.)

James: All right, I want my audience back, Dark Koopa!

Dark Koopa: I don’t think so, I’m interviewing Wario.

James: Oh yeah? Well I’m interviewing Dry Bowser, AND... I’m giving a Koopaling vote to each of the people who come watch.

Dark Koopa: Please, like that’s going to work. Right guys? ... Guys?

(A Goomba is left in the audience.)

Last Goomba: Why am I always last in the audience?

James: Ha! I see which Interview is more popular now! I’d better go now.

Back at the studio...

James: All right. Like I said before. I’m interviewing Dry Bowser.

Dry Bowser: Hi everybody (again)!

James: Okay! Let’s get on to the show! First question, are you Bowser?

Dry Bowser: Actually no, I’m not. That’s why I appeared in Mario Kart Wii as a racer when Bowser was already in it.

James: Wow, what a shock.

Dry Bowser: I know.

James: Anyway, question two, how are you alive right now?

Dry Bowser: Instead of a regular Magikoopa, Kamek brought me back to life.

James: Okay, now for... THE BIG QUESTION.

Dry Bowser: That’s big all right.

James: Who are you?

Dry Bowser: I’m actually Morton Koopa Sr.

Bowser Jr: Grandpa!

Dry Bowser: Yeah, yeah

James: Woah, you’re my grandpa?

Dry Bowser: You’re my grandson?

James: Yes...

Dry Bowser: Then yes.

James: All right, it’s time for audience questions. Seat Replacedbykammykoopa.

Kamek: Who do you like better: me, or Kammy Koopa?

Dry Bowser: You, duh!

Kamek: Oh yeah! You hear that, Kammy?!

James: Seat hedoesnotsleep,hewaits.

Chuck Norris: I do not have a question.

James: You will.

Chuck Norris: No, I won’t

James: You won’t?

Chuck Norris: Umm, I do?

James: Yes. You do.

Chuck Norris: Okay, do you hate Luigi?

Dry Bowser: That character?! No! I can beat him easy!

James: Does that answer your question?

Chuck Norris: Yes. It does.

James: Seat weddingcake!

Morton: Isn’t it weird how we have the same name? I guess you like wedding cake as much as I do because I-

James: Security!!!

Lemmy: You don’t get security. Only after your fourth Interview.

James: Dang it! Seat icreatedyouall!

Shigeru Miyamoto: Explain how you became Bowser in the final level of New Super Mario Bros.

Dry Bowser: When Bowser Jr. threw me into the pot, Bowser was there waiting to switch places so he could kill Mario.

James: Well, that’s all the time we have on this show! End-

Dark Koopa: Wait! Whoever comes to my Interview gets two Koopaling votes!

(Everybody runs out except James, Lemmy, and that one Goomba.)

Last Goomba: Aw, come on!!!

Lemmy: You didn’t pay them their Koopaling votes yet, did you?

James: Nope. Now I can say END TRANSMISSION.

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