(After a long year of no interviews form Sam, the Dormant Glitz Pit suddenly comes back to life. The old faithful audience take their seats, hoping for a glimpse from Sam. Suddenly, Ozie Osbourne's Crazy Train starts playing. The famous young Shy Guy interviewer, his Octopus assistant Dr. Kranken, his faithful Entei, and two people never seen with him, a Lucario and a Mii that looks zombie-ish, rise from a hole in the floor.)
(Lucario uses Fire Punch and burns Axem Red to a crisp.)
Axem Red: ... I hate my life.
Sam: Now today, I interview someone random! I pick... the Cheep Cheep in seat 546.
Cheep Cheep: Do I have to?
Sam: Do you want to be Entei's snack?
Cheep Cheep: No.
Sam: Then haul your butt up here.
Cheep Cheep flops onto the ring/stage.
Sam: So, do Cheep Cheeps grow up into Boss Bass or Big Berthas?
Cheep Cheep: Well, it depends on the gender. Males become Boss Bass and females become Big Berthas.
Dr. Kranken: So that means you'll be...
Cheep Cheep: A Big Bertha, yep! I'll finally be able to taste probably the best meat around, Shy Guy! Mmm...
Sam: O_O!! *shudder*
Dr. Kranken: So what's your relation to Cheepskipper?
Cheep Cheep: They're what my species become if they're exposed to Wiggler DNA.
Sam: So that's why Cheepskipper has issues...
Cheepskipper: I DON'T GOT ISSUES!!! DIIIIIIIIIIIE!!!
Cheepskipper jumps at Sam.
Sam: Eep. SECURITY!!!
Entei, Lucario, Zombie Bob, and a whole bunch of Anti Guys beat Cheepskipper into a bloody pulp.
Sam: Woah. Anyway, what are your feelings on Bloopers?
Cheep Cheep: DON'T YOU DARE MENTION THAT NAME IN MY PRESENCE!!! I DO NOT TOLERATE SQUIDS WHO HAVE BECOME CHAMPION OF ROY'S SPORTS HALL BY PURE FREAKIN' LUCK WHILE MY RACE USES PURE SKILL BUT DOESN'T GET PAST THE FIRST BATTLE!!!
Sam: Woah, she can yell.
Dr. Kanken: Don't you have any powers besides swimming and flopping around?
Cheep Cheep: Well, we are pretty adaptable, and can survive anywhere, even in volcanoes.
DT: Okay, now please state your name, occupation, and game of origin.
Goomba: Do- I mean Goomba, cashier, and Super Mario RPG.
DT: No, the Goomba appeared in Super Mario Bros, not SMRPG.
Goomba: Oops, sorry.
DT: Tell us abou- Oh, who am I kidding? The Goomba is the most boring creature on all of Plit. WHY AM I DOING THIS?!
Goomba: I AM NOT BORING!!! I know magic and have mastered a mechanical snake! Does that sound boring to you?!
DT: What?! But that sounds like a description of... Oh my DAD. YOU?!
Goomba: YES DT, FOR IT IS I, BACK FROM THE BOWELS OF THE UNDERWHERE TO TAKE MY REVENGE ON YOU, FOR I AM (you all saw this coming) DOMINO!!!
DT: I thought I fired you five Interviews ago. Why are you dressed as a Goomba?
Domino: Because once that Interview got posted I was turned into a laughingstock. I couldn't find a job anywhere, so I disguised myself as a Goomba and found employment as a cashier for a pizza restaurant.
DT: PATHETIC! Anyway, how did you find Cloaker as a partner in SMRPG?
Domino: Well I was taking care of Mad Adder when another snake found its way to me. This snake was Earthlink and was the pet of Cloaker, so we decided to become partners. After word of our prowess spread, the Smithy Gang recruited us.
DT: Very un-interesting.
Doopliss: AHH!!! MAN MADE OF JAM!!! RUN AWAY!!!
DT: I think he's talking about you. Anyway, where did you get your magic?
Domino: I accidentally ate a Starman.
DT: Then why aren't you invincible?
Domino: It wasn’t a pure one like the ones you find in ? Blocks.
DT: Why is your name Domino?
Domino: It was the first thing I managed to use magic on. I turned it into a giant snake (AKA Mad Adder).
DT: Well that’s all I have the patience to ask... Now I need a couple of things from you.
Domino: NEVER! I despise you and will never help you!
DT: Fine, then I'll keep on ordering pizza and put you out of business.
Domino: What do you want?
DT: Half of your paycheck. Therepy, the set being destroyed, like, seven times, and trying to pull the set back out from the void sent my paycheck from 50 coins to 0 coins.
Domino: Fine, better than being put out of business. Mad Adder!
Mad Adder wraps himself around the set and crushes it like a bug.
Domino: And that is my revenge. Goodbye, DT.
Bogmire: End transmission.
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