Lemmy: Well it’s been six months… again, and once again my Interview crew decided to show me up and leave me with all the interviewing, paperwork, and making Mario stop ending his sentences with Wahoo noises.
Mario: Super Mario Galaxy, Wahoo!
Lemy: Stop it.
Mario: Mario Kart Wii, Wahoo!
Lemmy: Cut it out!
Mario: I have to go to the bathroom, Wahoo!
Lemmy: Ugh, what a job this is…
(Suddenly two Shy Guys wearing bandanas around their eyes appear from a puff of smoke.)
Karate Guy 1: Oh, don’t worry, Lemmy, the Karate Duo Number 1 is here.
Lemmy: Wait, who in the world are you?
Karate Guy 2: We are karate are Karate Duo Number 1.
Karate Guy 1: Number 1.
Lemmy: Hang on, how can you be Number 1 if you’re a duo?
Karate Guy 1: Because we are number 1.
Karate Guy 2: Number 1 beat all.
Lemmy: What?!
Karate Guy 1: Karate beat all.
Karate Guy 2: Number 1.
Lemmy: What in the world are you talking about?
Karate Guy 1: KYAAAAAAAA!
Karate Guy 2: HWAAAAAAAAA!
Karate Guy 1: HIYAAAAAAAAAAA!
Karate Guy 2: WHAAAAAAAAAAA!!!
Lemmy: Ok, I get it, now why are you here?
Karate Guy 1: We are here to do interview for G.G. Crew. We usually do mercenary work but they pay us big money to takeover.
Karate Guy 2: Big money!
Lemmy: Uh huh, well you’re a little much for my taste but I guess beggar’s can’t be choosers. Anyway, if you’re taking over then your Interview is with this Princess Peach fangirl.
Rosalina: I’m Rosalina, the ruler of all Lumas.
Lemmy: Whatever you say, fan chick.
Rosalina: …
Karate Guy 2: Ok, we interview you now.
Karate Guy 1: Interview now.
Karate Guy 2: You sit in the chair.
Karate Guy 1: Big expensive chair.
(She does so.)
Karate Guy 1: Ok, how did you become Luma ruler?
Karate Guy 2: How did you do it, tell us?
Rosalina: Well one day I saw a shooting star fall the ground and in there I found a Luma in a ship. Afterwards I went into space to help him find his friends, and before long I was covered in Lumas who started calling me mama. Since then I became their ruler, helping them to become great galaxies that spread across the universe.
Karate Guy 2: You make us bored now.
Karate Guy 1: We fall asleep now.
Karate Guy 2: Ok, nap over.
Karate Guy 1: Back to interview, why do you look so much like Peach?
Karate Guy 2: Tell us now!
Rosalina: Well this is only a myth, but I believe that Peach is a relative of mine. After all, I’ve been around for over 1,000 years, so it’s a possibility.
Karate Guy 2: How do you keep yourself looking so young if you’re so old?
Karate Guy 1: So very old.
Rosalina: Well since I became the Luma ruler, I have been enchanted by the Lumas with mystical star energy that gives me eternal youth.
Karate Guy 1: That’s too much work; you should try keeping youth a much easier way.
Rosalina: Well can you think of anything else that gives you eternal youth?
(The karate duo pull out chocolate bars.)
Karate Duo Number 1: LUCKY CANDY!!!
Karate Guy 1: It can cure anything.
Karate Guy 2: Anything at all.
Karate Guy 1: It makes you stronger.
Karate Guy 2: Much stronger.
Karate Guy 1: You can become a grand fighter.
Karate: Grand fighter.
Lemmy: This is an Interview show, not an advertisement. Get back to it.
Karate Guy 1: Ok, now we ask you about Grand Stars.
Karate Guy 2: Grand Stars, how do they work?
Rosalina: Well, as you know, Power Stars work as power sources that can give great power to their wielder, especially if you collect a lot of them. But Grand Stars have an everlasting amount of great star energy that can grant endless Star Power to their user, which is why I normally use them to power my ship.
Karate Guy 1: Ok, you make us bored again.
Karate Guy 2: So very boring.
Karate Guy 1: Let’s take another nap.
Karate Guy 2: Nap’s over, why did you appear in Mario Kart Wii?
Karate Guy 1: What is the answer?
Rosalina: Since Mario Galaxy did so well, they wanted me to appear again in another game, so they put me in Mario Kart Wii and changed the Rainbow Road to have a more Mario Galaxy theme.
Karate Guy 1: Ok, last question before audience time.
Karate Guy 2: The time of audience.
Karate Guy 1: Why do you feed Lumas Star Bits?
Rosalina: That’s their favorite food.
Karate Guy 1: But Lumas are stars too, your Lumas are cannibals.
Karate Guy 2: Murderous cannibals.
Rosalina: No, Star Bits are basically non-living shooting stars, whereas Lumas are living organism stars.
Karate Guy 1: Stars that eat others.
Karate Guy 2: They’re cannibals.
Karate Guy 1: Instead they should eat…
Karate Duo Number 1: LUCKY CANDY!!!
Lemmy: I said no advertisements.
Karate Guy 2: Ok, now audience ask question to you.
Karate Guy 1: Lots of questions.
Karate Guy 2: Ok, we choose seat number 1
Karate Guy 1: ‘Cause number one beat all.
Paratroopa: Why does your ship only return to the Mushroom Kingdom every 100 years?
Rosalina: Well after being away from my home for so long, I got homesick, so I decided that during our orbit of the galaxy we should stop by the earth every 100 years.
Paratroopa: Why does it have to be 100 years?
Rosalina: Well the galaxy is a big place to orbit. What do you expect?
Karate Guy 1: Ok, we choose seat 16, which is not as good as 1
Karate Guy 2: ‘Cause number 1 beat all.
Larry: What kind of powers can you use?
Rosalina: I can create forcefields and float in the air.
Larry: Is that it?
Rosalina: Yep.
Larry: …
Rosalina: …
Larry: …
Rosalina: ...
Karate Guy 2: Ok, now last question from seat 68, which is still not as good as num-
Lemmy: Ok, we get the point, you like the number 1, sheesh!
Daisy: Is it true that you and Luigi have some sort of, I dunno, romantic relationship going on with each other?
Rosalina: No, he’s a nice person but he isn’t my type, but he is a bit cute, I guess.
Daisy: I KNEW IT, YOU WRETCH!!!
(Daisy jumps at Rosalina and the two engage in a catfight.)
Karate Guy 1: Ok, that’s the end.
Karate Guy 2: No more at all.
Mario: Wahoo, WAHOO!
Lemmy: Stop it!
Karate Guy 1: Let us handle him, Lemmy, karate is our specialty.
Karate Guy 2: ‘Cause karate beat all.
(The Karate Duo disappear in a puff of smoke and reappear in front of Mario.)
Karate Guy 1: KIYAAAAAAAAAAAAA!
Karate Guy 2: HWAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!
Karate Guy 1: YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!
Karate Guy 2: WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!
(Mario shoots fireballs at them and lights them on fire.)
Karate Guy 1: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!!!
Karate Guy 2: YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAGH!
Karate Guy 1: GAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!
Karate Guy 2: WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!
Lemmy: I think that’s the cue to END TRANSMISSION!
Whoops! You're not logged in! |