Black Yoshi 99: Hi everyone! Today, I’ll be interviewing the one, the only… KING KOOP-AAH!!!
King Boo: OH, OH! I’M A BETTER KING!!! DO ME!!!
Black Yoshi 99: U_U… Fine… BUT DON’T DO THIS AGAIN!!!
King Boo: You have my ghostly word! Now, why is your name Black Yoshi 99?
Black Yoshi 99: I-
King Boo: BUZZZ!!! Wrong! What color is my underwear?
Black Yoshi 99: KING BOO!!! First of all, I’m giving the Q’s and you're giving the A’s! Second, you’re a ghost, therefore, YOU DON’T HAVE UNDERWEAR!!!
King Boo: : (
Black Yoshi 99: Oh no, none of that!
King Boo: WAAAAAAHAAAAAAHAAAAA!!!
Black Yoshi 99: See, that’s another thing! You’re a ghost, which means no bodily functions! That means no tears!
King Boo: Are you so sure that I have no bodily functions?
Black Yoshi 99: What’s that smell? OH, YOU DIDN’T!
King Boo: I did.
Black Yoshi 99: If I died right now (which would be very likely were it not for the fact that Mario characters don’t die), I would not say “How old were you before you died?”
King Boo: … I can’t remember.
Black Yoshi 99: … Uh-huh… Okay… Why do you send your minions after Mario?
King Boo: ‘Cause…
Black Yoshi 99: … ‘Cause why?
King Boo: If he were one of us, he’d be the most powerful one!
Black Yoshi 99: So you see, this is why dead people creep me out.
King Boo: And by dead people you mean...?
Black Yoshi 99: You.
King Boo: I’m dead? NNNNOOOOOOOO!!!
Black Yoshi 99: … Um… Yeah… You’re a ghost… A big, round one that thinks that covering your eyes makes you invisible… Ya know I can see you!
King Boo: But I’m invisible!
Black Yoshi 99: Prove it.
King Boo: Prove I’m not.
Black Yoshi 99: You’re to my left.
King Boo: I can’t see you… You can’t see me!
Black Yoshi 99: Yeah, whatever, moron!
Mario: My-a name is-a Mario!
Black Yoshi 99: Wha- How? Never mind! Just go home!
Mario: Okie-dokie!
Black Yoshi 99: … Anyway, what do like to think of as home?
King Boo: Normally I’d say “Home is where the heart is.” But you’d say I don’t have a heart. Well I do! It’s in the graveyard downtown.
Black Yoshi 99: Well… that was… nice. Now, do you prefer small, homely cabins, or huge mansions with guys dressed in green using a vacuum to act like the Ghostbusters?
King Boo: GHOSTBUSTERS?! NNNNOOOO!!!
Black Yoshi 99: HEY!!! King Idiot! I’m still interviewing over here!
King Boo: Sorry… Cabinet.
Black Yoshi 99: … Okay then… Sure… I think you mean cabin.
King Boo: Who’s a mean cabin?
Black Yoshi 99: NEXT QUESTION!!! Do you wish you were alive?
King Boo: Nnnnnnnnnnnnnnnoooooooooooooooooooo.
Black Yoshi 99: Why did you kidnap Luigi in Super Mario 64 DS? Why not Peach? Or Mario?
King Boo: Four reasons: One, he was easy to capture. Two, I wanted revenge for Luigi’s Mansion. Three, I was bored. And four, every time I looked at him, he screamed like a sissy girl! You gotta love that!
Black Yoshi 99: Do you enjoy being scary?
King Boo: Kinda. But it really cuts into my social life!
Black Yoshi 99: Don't you mean social AFTERlife?
King Boo: SHUT UP!!!
Black Yoshi 99: 0_0… Sorry-
King Boo: I SAID SUT UP!!!
Black Yoshi 99: …
King Boo: And before I let you speak, I shall go back a few questions. When I died, I was 99. (Just one more second! One more! So close to 100!)
Black Yoshi 99: … Okay… Now, for the final question (save the audience), why do you and your minions only attack people when their backs are turned? Some people say that you’re a coward.
King Boo: THEY SPEAK THE TRUTH!!!
Black Yoshi 99: So you’re afraid of living things?
King Boo: Well-
Black Yoshi 99: On with the audience questions! Seat… BETTERTOBEQUIET!!!
Morton: If Mario was the most powerful Boo, couldn’t he easily surpass, exceed, overthrow, usurp you from the throne?
King Boo: No. I CONTROL ALL BOOS' MINDS!!!
Black Yoshi 99: I wonder how he does that with a mind as small as his?
King Boo: I HEARD THAT!!!
Black Yoshi 99: Okay… Seat WHYDOESTHISGUYEATEVERYONE.
Kirby: Vial, vial?
Black Yoshi 99: Why don’t they just tell us the names of these people? GET OUT OF HERE!!! Seat MR.MEDIEVALSWORDGUY.
Link: TWUP HU-HA… HHHAAAAAAAAAAA?
Black Yoshi 99: Grr... If you’re not a Mario related character, get out!
(Only three characters stay in their seats.)
Black Yoshi 99: Morton, you can leave out of that door to the left. You know, the one that goes to the torture chamber- I mean, uh, bathroom! Yeah, the bathroom!
Morton: Why the bathroom?
Black Yoshi 99: There’s a wedding cake in there.
Morton: Oh boy!
Black Yoshi 99: Seat I’MWITHDUMMY.
Luigi: Do you like Luigi’s Man-
King Boo: No. Well, I like that there are more ghosts, but trying to get rid of them, I hate.
Black Yoshi 99: Okay! Onward! Seat ICAN'TBEATADUMBPLUMBER!
Bowser: I WAS SUPPOSED TO BE INTERVIEWED TODAY!!! ROAR!!!
(Bowser begins to charge King Boo.)
Black Yoshi 99: AAHHHH!!! END TRANSMISSION!!! *phew* Good anger scene, Bowser! The viewers could never have guessed that we had the whole thing planned! HEY! I said END TRANSMISSION!!!
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