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DOUBLE G GOOMBA, KOOPA 13, AND CHOMPY interview MIMI
 
By koopa 13 and Double G Goomba

(Mario is seen flying around as Bee Mario.)

Mario: I’m-a Bee Mario.

G.G: That’s nice.

(He reappears as Boo Mario.)

Mario: I'm-a Boo Mario.

Koopa 13: That’s lovely.

(He reappears as Ice Mario.)

Mario: I'm-a Ice Mario.

(G.G. melts Mario with a Fire Flower.)

Mario: I'm-a Melted Mario.

Lemmy: He’s been doing that ever since Super Mario Galaxy came out.

Koopa 13: Well tell him to keep it to himself.

Lemmy: Then he would be Emo Mario.

(Mario returns wearing black.)

Mario: I’m-a Emo Mario. I go to Hot Topic.

G.G: Can we just do this so I can leave this studio?

Mimi: I'm here.

G.G: Awwwwwwwwwwwwwww, it’s wittle girl. Do you wants some candy, wittle girl?

Mimi: Shut up.

Koopa 13: Do you need a diaper change, little sweetums?

Mimi: Stop talking to me like a baby.

Chompy: Bark bark bark.

Mimi: THAT'S IT!

(Mimi throws rupees at G.G's head.)

G.G: Awwwwww, I think I'm gonna get a wittle concussion.

Mimi: Just interview me, you stupid Goomba.

G.G: Ok then, little one, what kind of species are you supposed to be?

Mimi: I’m a Human made out of squares.

G.G: Haha, you evolved from a monkey.

Mimi: YOU WILL DIE!

G.G: Of course I will.

Koopa 13: AHHHHHHHH!

(Koopa 13 is seen stepping on a mouse trap.)

Koopa 13: MEHHH, that was not cool.

Mario: I'm-a Mouse Trap Setting-Up Mario.

G.G: That’s not even a power-up.

Mario: I'm-a No Power-Up Mario.

Koopa 13: Just get outta here.

Mario: I'm-a Get Outta Here Mario.

(He jumps out the window.)

Mimi: Can we continue this please?

Koopa 13: What’s with all your mischievous behavior?

Mimi: Count Bleck raised me like that.

Chompy: Bark bark.

G.G: He says how did you meet Count Bleck?

Mimi: When I was little I was abandoned by my parents and sent to an orphanage. There Count Bleck found me and gave me my cool powers. In exchange I was to help him destroy the world.

G.G : You are aware that you would be destroyed as well, right?

Mimi: The Count said he would create a force field around the castle to keep us alive, and rebuild the world.

Count Bleck: Count Bleck lied, BLEH HEH HEH HEH BLECK!

Mimi: He's so awesome.

Koopa 13: How did you get the ability to shape shift into anyone?

Mimi: Apparently I had that power dormant inside my body, but the Count released it and taught me to control it.

G.G: Awwwwwwwww, the wittle girl can shape shift! How cute.

Mimi: I TOLD YOU TO STOP THAT!

Koopa 13: What, you’re gonna shape shift? Hahaha!

(She turns into a giant spider.)

Mimi: MIMIMIMIMIMIMIMIMIMMIMIMI!

(G.G. spays her with bug spray.)

Mimi: No! Nnot the bug spray! IT BUUUUUUUUUUUUUUURNS!

(She changes back and starts to shake on the ground.)

G.G: Awwwwwwwwwwww, now you're having a wittle seizure.

Koopa 13: Well that answers one question, that her weakness is bug spray.

G.G: Now then, if you’re done with that, how did you feel about your comrades?

Koopa 13: Hey, one question per turn.

G.G: All right… My turn. Now answer the question.

Mimi: Well I got along well with O'chunks even though he was stinky Scottish guy, I always had a bad feeling about Dimentio, and the Count, well I looked to him as a father figure.

Koopa 13: And what about Nastasia?

Mimi: She scares me.

Count Bleck: Get in line, said Count Bleck, wetting himself.

Chompy: Bark bark?

G.G: He says why did you work for Merlee at the end of the game?

Mimi: She was gone at the time so I pretended to be her maid so I could cute up her house.

G.G: Tch, women. Anyway it’s audience time. Deal… or no deal?

Audience: Huh?

G.G: Never mind, seat 45.

Merlon: How come you always fight in your spider form?

Mimi: It’s my favorite form.

G.G: Seat 78.

Gloomba: Why don’t you transform into something useful like a buff fighter or a giant dragon or Mike Tyson or something like that?

Mimi: Because a CERTAIN PARTY HAT-WEARING DUPLIGHOST BEAT ME TO IT!

Doopliss: Yeah! That’s right! We Duplighosts wear the fanciest party hats!

Mimi: You wanna make something of it, sheet boy?!

G.G: All right, calm down and sit.

(Inuyasha falls on the stage.)

G.G: Who in the world is that?

Koopa 13: I know, it’s a… doggy.

G.G: Well he's ugly to look at... JANITOR!

(Mario mops him off the stage with a broom.)

Mario: I’m-a Janitor Mario.

G.G: Oh come on! That’s not even creative. Whatever, seat 23.

Goomba: How come you don’t transform into your spider form in level 6-2?

Mimi: I didn’t feel like it.

G.G: Wimp. Seat 65.

Bob-omb: How come in the beginning you kept transforming from O'Chunks to Bowser and to Count Bleck?

Mimi: Because it’s fun.

Duplighost: She's right about that.

G.G: Seat 3.

Wiggler: Why was that vase so expensive?

Mimi: Because it’s from a distant land. In Mushroom Kingdom they don’t cost as much, but in Hyrule it cost 1,000,000,000 rubees.

Link: I just saved you from Ganon.

Mimi: You did not.

Link: How about a kiss for luck?

Chompy: Huh?

Link: How about a-

(Mimi throws a rubee at Link's head.)

Mimi: Dummy, tight-wearing girly man.

G.G: Last seat, seat last. Go figure.

Grodus: Why do you use rubees as your weapon of choice?

Mimi: Well let's see, they're hard, rocky, and knock people out easily. What's not to like?

G.G: Ok, that’s it for-

Mario: I'm-a Plumber Mario.

Koopa 13: You already are a plumber.

Mario: I’m-a Mario Mario.

G.G: Ok, that’s it!

(The G.G. Crew form into a tower.)

G.G: SUPER-

Koopa 13: POWER-

Chompy: ATTACK-

(The Crew spin while in tower form, with G.G’s bat sticking out.)

Mario: I’m-a Jumper Mario.

(Mario jumps into the air as the Crew comes at him. They bust through the wall and into an exploding a Bob-omb.)

G.G: Owie! We got defeated by Mario.

Audience: GET IN LINE!

Mario: I’m-a END TRANSMISSION Mario.

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