Monty Mole Day was coming the next day, the one time of the year where Monty Mole would pop up and tell all of Plit if there would be six more weeks of winter if he sees his shadow. Well Mario, Peach, and Camera Lakitu were off to Plitzatauny to celebrate Monty Mole Day, but Mario wasn’t happy about it at all.
Mario: I don’t know why people like to see that rat pop out of its hole each year. You know, it doesn’t really know if there will be six more weeks of winter.
Peach: Of course it does, and it is a mole, not a rat.
Mario: Bah, humbug.
Peach: Christmas is over, no need to be a scrooge.
Mario: Whatever.
When they finally arrived, it was late at night. They all got their rooms and hit the sack since they had a big day tomorrow. In the morning Mario woke up last and went to get his shower, but the water was freezing cold.
Mario: WOAH! WHAT THE?!
So Mario skipped his shower, went down and yelled at the receptionist in the lobby for about fifteen minutes threatening to sue, then was rushed off for Monty Mole Day.
So Mario, Camera Lakitu, and Peach went over for the event. Mario took his position as reporter, Peach directed, and Camera Lakitu rolled turned on the camera.
Mario: Hello ladies and gentlemen, thank you for coming to this completely stupid festival where the darn mole pops out of its hole, tells us what the darn forecast is, and then gets paid about 200 darn dollars. Next year, just stick with the weathermen so I don’t have to come out here.
Viewers, Peach, and Crowd: ...
Mario: Let’s get this over with, I’ve got a dentist appointment I really don’t want to miss. So stupid mole, get out of your burrow and tell us what the darn forecast is.
The mole came out of his hole, looked around, and... *gasp* saw its shadow.
Monty Mole: AAAAUUUUGHH!!!
The mole quickly dived back into its hole.
Mario: ... What a wimp, scared of his own shadow. Well, that’s it folks, the stupid mole saw its shadow, but trust me, there’s NOT going to be six more weeks of winter.
Goomba: But the weather channel called for a blizzard this afternoon.
Mario: What does the weather guy know, huh? NOTHING! I’m heading back to the Mushroom Kingdom.
Koopa: What a grouch.
Mario was walking over to the parking lot when a Toad came running over to him.
Ned the Toad: MARIO! It’s me, Ned.
Mario: Who?
Ned: Ned the Toad. Remember? I did the whistling belly button talent show in high school. Remember?
Mario: Oh yeah, don’t remember.
Ned: ...
Mario: See ya later.
Mario was driving back to the Mushroom Kingdom, just when the blizzard decided to let loose on Mario, Peach, and Camera Lakitu, who were all driving in Mario’s convertible.
Mario: @%&$%!!!
Peach: The forecast did call for a blizzard...
Police Toad: Sorry, but we can’t let you through, it’s too dangerous.
Mario: Whatever, let’s head back and stay at the hotel until it passes.
That’s exactly what they did. Mario went to bed early and said he didn’t want to wake up until late in the afternoon. But the next morning...
KNOCK KNOCK KNOCK!
Peach: Let’s go, we’ve got to get moving Mario!
Mario: ... Hmm?
Mario glanced at the clock.
Mario: What?! It’s seven in the morning! I said I wanted to sleep into the afternoon!
Peach: We’ve got to be there by nine o’ clock, we don’t have time to sleep in this morning. Remember?
Mario: And why can’t I?
Peach: We’re filming Monty Mole Day, remember?
Mario blinked a few times.
Mario: But... but... we did that yesterday.
Peach: ... No we didn’t. Are you feeling ok?
Mario: Umm... Yeah, I guess.
So he went to take his shower, but the water was freezing cold.
Mario: What the? Oh yeah, I forgot, the water heater doesn’t work.
He went down, yelled at the receptionist for 15 minutes, and was rushed off by Peach for the event... again. Everybody took their places.
Mario: Well, it’s Monty Mole Day... again. Umm... Mole, go ahead and pop out of your stupid hole.
Monty Mole popped out, saw his shadow, screamed, and dived into his hole.
Mario: Well, that’s it folks. Monty Mole Day is over with, now continue on with your lives.
Mario was walking down to his car when Ned the Toad walked up.
Ned: MARIO! Wow, what a coincidence that we bumped into each other!
Mario: Yeah. Umm... It’s Ned, right?
Ned: You remember!
Mario: Unfortunately, yeah. Gotta go!
Mario got into his car and tried to explain this whole matter to Peach and Camera Lakitu, who responded with confused faced.
Peach: You weren’t drinking too much Koopa Kola, were you?
Mario: No. You think I’m crazy?
Camera Lakitu: Pretty much.
Mario: Rrrr... Just get us out of here and back to the Mushroom Kingdom.
They drove along, but then a blizzard let loose on them... again.
Mario: ...
Police Toad: Sorry, but we can’t let you through, it’s too dangerous.
Mario: THAT’S BALONEY! I’M GOING THROUGH!
Police Toad: I’m sorry, you can’t.
Mario: I guess we’ll just go back to the hotel then.
Mario went back, cautiously got in bed, and dozed off. Then...
KNOCK KNOCK KNOCK!
Mario: You have GOT to be kidding me. It’s seven o’ clock... AGAIN!
Peach: We’ve got-
Mario: Let me guess, Monty Mole Day to get ready for?
Peach: Yeah, don’t dawdle.
Mario: (to self) You know, if this day is going to repeat itself over and over, I’m going to do whatever I want.
So Mario got dressed, turned on the shower, put it on the coldest it could get, then went downstairs.
Mario: Excuse me?
Receptionist: Yes, may I help you?
Mario: Could you come upstairs to my bathroom real quick? There’s a maintenance problem.
Receptionist: Okay...
They went upstairs and into the bathroom, then Mario pushed the receptionist into the tub of cold water.
Mario: DRINK IT, YOU JERK!
Mario then headed out for Monty Mole Day.
Peach: All right, places everybody, places!
Mario: Hi, welcome to “Secret Telling Time” Our first secret we have, is of Princess Peach!
Peach: What?!
Mario: That’s right! Princess Peach has to have the ugliest face in the world, and she thinks it looks good! WHAT AN UGLY PERSON!
Peach: YOU JERK!
Mario stuck out his tongue. Then he walked to get into his car when Ned came walking up.
Ned: MARIO! What a coincidence bumping into each other at Plitzatauny!
Mario: Hey there, Ned!
Mario decked Ned in the face.
Peach: What is going on here, Mario?! That had to be the meanest thing I’ve EVER seen you do!
Mario: Prepare for more, baby!
Mario decked Peach in the face as well. Then the police showed up to arrest Mario.
Police Toad: That’s enough! Break it up!
Mario: Who, me?
Police Toad: Yeah, you! You are in big trouble! Hitting a lady is a federal offense, you know!
Mario: Hitting anybody is a federal offense.
Police Toad: You admit it!
Mario: Not at all. I can do whatever I want, because tomorrow, it’s just going to be Monty Mole Day again!
Police Toad: That’s no reason for being bad!
Mario: For me it is!
Mario ran away with the Toad following in his car. Mario jumped off a cliff where at the bottom awaited a pit of boiling lava.
Mario: Time to try this out!
He fell into the lava and got a Game Over. But then...
KNOCK KNOCK KNOCK!
Mario: I’M ALIVE! YAY!
KNOCK KNOCK KNOCK!
Mario: Go away!
Peach: But we have to get ready for Monty Mole Day!
Mario: No, we don’t.
Peach: YES, we do!
Mario: But I don’t want to.
Peach: Do it or I will call you a name!
Mario: I’M COMING, I’M COMING!
Mario did the Monty Mole Day ceremony just like he did the first time, then went to the coffee shop in town. He ordered 18 espressos.
Kurk the Clerk: The limit is 17 espressos, bub.
Mario: Fine.
Kurk handed Mario the 17 cups of coffee. Mario chugged them down as fast as he could.
Mario: I won’t fall asleep, thus resulting in staying awake and getting to tomorrow! Wait... I feel a little... buzz. COOOOOFFFFEEEEEEEE!!!
Mario ran around the store breaking objects and then ran outside. He jumped on Monty Mole’s head a gazillion times. Monty got a Game Over.
Mario: HAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!
Mario stayed up through the night, wrecking everything in the town. But when it hit seven o’ clock in the morning Mario instantly stopped wrecking the town, and the next thing he knew is that he was in bed.
Mario: *sigh* I want to get to tomorrow. I’m sick of replaying this day over and over again. Maybe I’ll stop being bad since it’s not doing any good.
So Mario got up, did his Monty Mole routine, and went over to learn Karate. He got up every morning, doing the same thing day after day. Soon, he was an expert at Karate and became better than his instructor. Then one day...
Mario: Time for another day.
POOF!
A small fairy appeared.
Mario: ... Jojora?
Jojora: Ahem... This is the part I play in the Scribble. They couldn’t find another fairy that would take the job for free.
Mario: Oh.
Jojora: Well Mario, you have done something useful with your time. I now grant you the privilege to advance on to the next day.
Mario: YIIIIPPPEEEEEEEEE!!! Thankyouthankyouthankyouthankyouthankyouthankyouthankyou!!!
Jojora: No prob.
Mario had a great time that day, but then the next day...
Mario: Ahhh... A new day!
He looked at his clock.
Mario: Uh oh. IT’S THE DAY AFTER MONTY MOLE DAY AGAIN!!!
(Credit goes toward the hilarious movie “Groundhog Day” for inspiring this story)
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