Luigi: Welcome to Luigi's Do-It-Your-Stinking-Self! Today I will teach you novices how to draw like an artist such as myself!
Toad: %#%, why I am I still here?
Luigi: Because you want to learn how to draw like an artist such as myself.
Toad: Luigi, I doubt you even know what drawing is.
Luigi: You're wrong! I very well know that drawing is when you make something that looks good! Ha, see, I told you I know it!
Toad: I swear I'm not even going to watch you mess this one up.
Toad heads to the door, but when he reaches the door, there is no door there.
Toad: What happened to the door?
Luigi: Oh, we had to make some costly budget cuts. It was either get rid of the door, or this lovely, ten-year-old grain of sand.
Toad: You’ve got to be kidding me.
Toad then attempts to jump out a window, but the glass doesn't break.
Luigi: You like it? I got unbreakable glass so that if we ever had to escape from this house we'd be trapped inside. Pretty clever of me, huh?
Toad: %#(*&!
Luigi: Oh, and don't try flushing yourself down the toilet. I locked the bathroom up and threw away the key.
Toad: Luigi, why would you do something as dumb as that?
Luigi: When I was in there, I pushed some lever on the toilet, and it made a loud, scary sound, like water was going through pipes of something. It scared me, so to make sure whatever was in the toilet won't escape and kill everyone, I locked the bathroom up.
Toad: I hate you, Luigi.
Luigi: I love you too, Toad.
Toad: Go die, Luigi!
Luigi: Toad, you know I love hearing how much you love me, but I must start teaching these uneducated scholars how to draw. So, step one: we must find something to draw on. Now, there are several things you can use. You can use paper, a chalkboard, wood, and many more. Now, instead of using one of those, we will use something that is incredibly good for drawing on, but is never used. Any guesses on what we'll be using?
Toad: Luigi, with you I honestly have no idea what whacky and useless thing we'll be drawing on.
Luigi: Oh, sorry, that's wrong. Today we will be drawing on Toad.
Toad: %(*#%(*!
Luigi tackles Toad and pins him down on a table.
Toad: I will kill you, Luigi!
Luigi: Aw, you love me so much! Next, we will need something to draw with. You can use a pencil, a pen, a paintbrush, and many more. Now, we won't use any of those. Can anyone guess what we are going to be using?
Toad: Oh man, I don't even want to THINK about what you're going to use.
Luigi: Wrong. We're going to use a flamethrower, and like Toad, it is incredibly good for drawing, but is never used.
Luigi pulls out a flamethrower.
Toad: Luigi, if you even think about using that on me I will kill you.
Luigi: Aw, stop it; your affection toward me is making me cry. Now, we must decide on what we're going to draw. It is preferred to draw something pretty and that has a happy feel to it and appeals to everyone. So, how about we draw a blood-sucking, man-eating, vampire Goomba!
Toad: Luigi, that is the worst idea for a drawing I've heard!
Luigi: Well, we now know what we're drawing on, what we're drawing with, and what we're going to be drawing, so let's start!
Toad: %#&^%*!
Luigi pulls out the flamethrower and starts to ignite it. Luigi then shoots the flamethrower all over Toad.
Toad: Youch!
Luigi continues until he is done, and Toad is entirely burnt.
Luigi: Hmm… Close enough to the puppy I wanted to draw.
Toad: Luigi… Luigi…
Luigi: Yes, my pretty?
Toad: What in all goodness sakes were you thinking? I swear, you messed this one up worse than all the other ones! You're an idiot!
Luigi: Thank you, and as always, I love you too. Well, thanks for watching, people, stay tuned for next time when I teach you how to cook a Toad.
Toad: %&*^*#!
Toad puts Luigi in a headlock and proceeds to attempt to choke him to death, and then starts punching Luigi all over.
Toad: I will kill you!
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