Announcer: LIVE FROM PRINCESS PEACH'S CASTLE IN THE MUSHROOM KINGDOM, IT'S
Crowd: MARIO NIGHT LIVE.
Announcer: AND NOW HERE'S YOUR HOST, THE PLUMBER WHO HAS TO RESCUE PRINCESS PEACH ON EVERY ADVENTURE, MARRIOO!
CROWD: YEAH, WHOOO!
Mario: Hello, welcome to Las Vegas!
Crowd: Las Vegas?
Mario gets whacked with a shoe.
Mario: I mean, welcome to-
Crowd: MARIO NIGHT LIVE!
Mario: Tonight, it's our pilot episode of Mario Night Live. And we are going to have new skits, funny and ridiculous reality stuff, and lots of CHEESE! And now let's here the theme song.
Mario Mario, it's nighttime so get live, Mario Night Live.
Mario: That was our theme song, named after me! And now a word from our sponsor, or go to a commercial or whatever you call it.
Commercial 1/Skit 1
Peach: Do you like pink? Do you have pink pajamas that you can curl up in and sleep like a baby in? Are you in love with the color pink? Then you can order Pink Supreme. With just a spray you can turn everything pink. Pink Supreme, where everyone likes pink.
Mario: And were back, and now here's a skit starring my arch-nemesis Dowser.
Bowser: That's Bowser!
Bowser Knows All
Bowser is seen laughing his head off at the TV. Soon Morton comes in.
Morton: Kingdadineedhelpnobodylikesmecausetheythinkitalktoomuchandit'sreallydumbcauseidon't thinkitalktoomuchbutitthinkit'sreallyimportantthatigetadvicefromsomeonewhoisgreatandaspowerful asyouandweddingcakewhatshouldidokingdadwhatshouldido-
Bowser: SHUT UP!
Morton: Really well all right if that's what I should do.
And for once Morton didn't talk, and soon he became so popular that he was liked by everybody.
That concludes this segment of Bowser Knows All.
Luigi singing love to an inanimate object
Luigi is seen holding a strip sweather.
Luigi: The best time to wear a strip sweather, is all the time! One with a collar, turtle neck, that's the kind. FOR WHEN YOU'RE WEARING that one special sweater... PEOPLE THROW TOMATOES AT YOU, and it gets all dirty... The end. The sweater gets insulted and mauls Luigi. Luigi: AAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH! That concludes Luigi singing love to an inanimate object. And now it's time to ask Wendy. Wendy: Hi, I'm Wendy. And this is the show where people send me letters and ask for my advice. (It had better be about shopping.) Now here's our first letter. It says
Dear Wendy, I somehow always get kidnapped by Bowser and Mario has to rescue me every time. I feel soo bad about that. I mean, poor Mario, he probably gets sick and tired of me. What should I do? Signed Poor Princess Wendy: Well, Poor Princess, here's what you should do. FIGHT HIM FOR ONCE. MY DAD, YOU ARE SUCH A WIMP. I MEAN, COME ON, HAVE YOU EVER HEARD OF MARTIAL ARTS? TAKE IT TO DEFEND YOURSELF. DAD. Wendy composes herself. Wendy: Now here's the next letter. Dear Wendy, I'm never noticed around anyone. I never get to go on any adventures, and my brother always steals my money. What should I do to get noticed more, and get back at my brother? Signed, Skinny Loser Guy Wendy: Well Skinny Loser Guy, here's what you should do. GET A REAL LIFE! I MEAN, YOU CAN'T EXPECT TO LIVE UP TO YOUR THIEVING BRO'S EXPECTATIONS! GET A JOB OR SOMETHING! DAD! That concludes Ask Wendy! Mario: Time for a commercial! Commercial 2 Wario walks onstage dressed like a spud. Wario: Potatoes, potatoes, potatoes, everyone eat potatoes! The spuds for me and you! Just then, Mr. Potato Head eats himself. Wario: Awwww... He was my favorite toy. Mario: Well that's the end of our show for tonight. Crowd: Ahh! Mario: Tune in next time (if Lemmy accepts the pilot) for- MARIO NIGHT LIVE. Mario: SEE YOU NEXT TIME! (maybe)
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