Dark Koopa: Who am I interviewing this time?
Dark Koopa: Goodbye!
Thumbs: What are you doing?
Dark Koopa: Leaving. I know what's going to happen. I'm going to get eaten again and somehow Pink will too and then I'll have to hear blah blah blah for the next 30 years like in that one Interview.
Thumbs: Didn't that Interview never happen?
Dark Koopa: Uh...
Thumbs: Look balloons?
Dark Koopa: Exactly.
(Dark Koopa runs off.)
Thumbs: Guess I'll do the Interview then. Today I interview Petey Piranha.
Petey: I'm hungry.
Thumbs: I assume you like to eat.
Petey: Of course.
Thumbs: What do you like to eat?
Petey: Koopas and Yoshis.
Dark Koopa: Noo!
Petey: Is that curtain talking?
Thumbs: (sarcastically) Oh yeah. We have magic curtains. They can do math too.
Petey: Wow.
Curtain: it was about time I was recognized.
Thumbs: ... How are you able to spit out graffiti?
Petey: My stomach acid is actually graffiti, so I can spit some out whenever I feel like it.
Thumbs: How do you make those graffiti Piranhas?
Petey: I mix some of my cells with the graffiti and I spit them out of my mouth.
Thumbs: Interesting.
Petey: I'm hungry.
Thumbs: Heard you the first time...
(Petey Piranha finds Dark Koopa, who wasn't hiding very well, and eats him.)
Petey: That's better.
Dark Koopa: Nooo! Blast you irony!
Pink: Hi.
Dark Koopa: Oh no. How did you get in here?
Pink: I don't know. I sorta just appeared in here. Anyway, I wrapped my bread with a garbage bag and threw it off Mt. Everest.
Dark Koopa: Blast you, writer!
Thumbs: Why are you partners with King Boo in Double Dash?
Petey: We both really like graffiti. Also, no one else would be my partner.
Thumbs: Why were you even involved in Double Dash?
Petey: Bowser asked King Boo and I to join. He said there were too many Mario Gang racers. He actually chose us over his own children.
Thumbs: Stupid audience, ask questions now.
Yellow: I'm not stupid, I'm misunderstood.
Thumbs: Silence! Seat 175.
Larry: How did you make that tornado?
Petey: I can spin around so fast, I can make tornadoes. Nintendo had to slow it down a lot, or it wouldn't look like I was spinning at all.
Thumbs: Seat 247.
Sonny: How did you become such a good golfer?
Petey: I used to play it all the time before I started working for Bowser.
Thumbs: Seat 99.
Roy: What's the deal with the shorts?
Petey: They aren't shorts, it's just my color pattern.
Thumbs: Seat 106.
Luigi: Got any weaknesses?
Thumbs: Why do you keep asking that?
Luigi: So I can beat the bad guys before Mario.
Thumbs: You are aware that Mario is sitting next to you, right?
Mario: I'm-a Mario!
Luigi: Yeah, but he won't figure anything out. He'll probably do something to end this Interview.
Thumbs: Don't give away the ending!
Petey: I'm not too fond of water. Also, if I'm turned over, a good ground pound can hurt me pretty badly.
(Mario suddenly knocks down Petey Piranha and ground punds him, sending Dark Koopa and Pink from out of his mouth.)
Luigi: NOO! He beat me again!
Pink: Eww, stinky. I'm going to go take a shower.
(Pink leaves.)
Dark Koopa: Wow, thanks Mario. I forgot why I ever hated you.
(Mario kisses Dark Koopa and dances out of the studio Daffy Duck style.)
Dark Koopa: Now I remember.
Luigi: HA! Told you he'd do something stupid.
(Thumbs drops a safe on Luigi.)
Thumbs: That'll teach ya to predict the future!
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