(The entire room is dark. Watt comes floating onto the stage.)

Watt: Welcome to another Interview! We have an interviewee that lives in the dark today, so we don't have any lights- except for me. Anyway, our interviewer today is, as many other times, Yellow Yoshi!

(Yellow walks onstage, but falls over Watt because of the dark.)

Yellow: Oww...

Watt: Hmm?

(Yellow sits down in his chair.)

Watt: And the, um, interviewee today is Dark Koopa!

(Dark Koopa walks onstage and sits down in the chair without many problems.)

Yellow: I wish I could see well in the dark. Oh well, hi Dark Koopa.

Dark Koopa: Hello Yellow. And for the record, it's not all that dark in the sewers. I mean, come on... I wear sunglasses. But yeah, I can see well in the dark.

Yellow: Okay, then I guess it's okay to turn on the lights.

(Yellow flips a lot of light switches.)

Yellow: That's better. Now, tell me how it is to live in the sewers. And by the by, what sewers do you live in?

Dark Koopa: I live in Toad Town Tunnels, the sewers of Toad Town. As for how it is, lousy. It smells and nothing but scum lives down there. *points to Gloomba* Like this moron. I didn't exactly decide to live here by choice. I came here because the rent is free and I have a very low budget of zero dollars and zero cents. On the plus side, I get a lot of cool stuff that people are stupid enough to throw down here. Also, there's cool underground music playing here.

Gloomba: I am not amused.

Dark Koopa: Shut it, you waste of space.

Yellow: Oh... well, next question. Do you work for Bowser?

Dark Koopa: Yeah. I work for Bowser. Basically I had to guard all these items that were in the sewers from Mario. Does he pay me? Of course not. He just sends me some of Larry's vegetables. Those nasty things; Larry may be my favorite Koopaling, but he couldn't grow good vegetables if his life depended on it

Larry: Heeey! I heard that!

(Larry is kicked out for no reason.)

Yellow: Remind me to find some better guards. But, here we go. Why do you wear sunglasses in the sewers?

Dark Koopa: Because they look cool. Okay, the real reason I wear them is because Bowser wanted to be able to tell the difference between the Koopa Troopas that worked for him and the ones that didn't, so he made all the Troopas that worked for him wear sunglasses, as well as spiked bracelets and neckbraces. This ended however after Mario defeated Bowser, but that doesn't mean I don't still wear them.

Mario: I feel happy.

Dark Koopa: Characters aren't supposed to announce how they feel. That makes me feel angry!

Yellow: ... Okay. So, what is your favorite Nintendo game ever? And what game are you looking forward to the most?

Dark Koopa: Well obviously, the game I look most forward to is Paper Mario 2. There's a good chance I'll be in it. As for my my favorite Nintendo game ever, Super Smash Bros. Melee. It was the one game where Mario getting beat up isn't necessarily a bad thing.

Yellow: What are your stats in Paper Mario?

Dark Koopa: I have 8 HP, 3 ATK, and 2 DEF.

Yellow: Any allies?

Dark Koopa: Spinies and Spike Tops.

Watt: (in Bill Cosby's voice) Do you know who's funnay? Bill Cosby.

Bill Cosby: Who wants a pudding pop?

Dark Koopa: I'll pass.

Yellow: What is your main weakness?

Dark Koopa: I can be flipped if I am jumped on. I can't attack for a turn and I lose my DEF.

Mario: Aha! I know-a you're weakness now! I'm-a gonna win!

Wario: My line!

(Mario jumps on Dark Koopa.)

Dark Koopa: Why you little... Will you please get rid of him?

Yellow: Gladly.

(Some Koopatrols throw Mario out the window.)

Dark Koopa: Give me a sec. I'll get up.

12 hours later...

Dark Koopa: I'm up!

Yellow: Finally.

(Dark Koopa trips on a banana peel.)

Dark Koopa: Lame...

Yellow: I've heard you yell about balloons. Can you explain this?

Dark Koopa: It's simple. When I have to escape from where I am for some reason, I yell "Look! Balloons!" They turn around like morons, then I run away.

Yellow: Has it ever not worked?

Dark Koopa: Look! Balloons!

(Yellow does not turn around.)

Dark Koopa: Just once.

Yellow: Can you explain how your dizzy attack works?

Dark Koopa: It's hard, but I'll give it a shot. We get a running start, and then we run in front of our target and spin in our shell, making our target dizzy. It's sort of like hypnosis.

Yellow: Interesting. Anyway, that's a lot of questions, so the audience can ask some questions now. Seat 13.

Goomba: What’s your favorite food?

Dark Koopa: Pizza. I bet you’re all surprised.

Yellow: Actually I’m not. Seat 49.

Cheep Cheep: What are you actually doing down in Toad Town Tunnels?

Dark Koopa: I live there, I guard for Bowser, and when I got nothing else to do, I've got a stereo. That's right. I listen to music down there. Where do you think the music for Toad Town Tunnels comes from?

Yellow: Uh, good point. Seat 135.

Chain Chomp: Bow-wow!

Yellow: That’s not a question! But, I think that’s it for today. See you next time when I interview Huff N. Puff!

Watt: End transmission!