Jalvo: Hello one and all to Jalvo the Slime’s Interview Show! I’ll be your host, and…
(Nobody finishes.)
Jalvo: Um, Boosly will be assisting me.
Boosly: I am?
Jalvo: Yes you are. For this Interview I didn’t have to fetch the net. Instead I was begging and going down on my knees for them to say yes.
Boosly: Is it some royalty like Peach?
Jalvo: No, I would use the net on her. It’s Lemmy Koopa!
Lemmy: Hello, Jalvo and Boosly.
Boosly: He knows my name!
Jalvo: Get used to it.
Boosly: To start off, is your hair really rainbow?
Jalvo: Couldn’t you think of anything more original.
Lemmy: That’s a good question. It's all natural! Well... I may use something to get it to stand straight...
Jalvo: Why did you start up Lemmy's Land?
Lemmy: Back in 1998 when the Internet was young, starting up a homepage seemed the thing to do. Well, not for me, because I knew that if I started a site, it would takeover my life. So I promised not to do so, but when Wendy started a site of her own, I finally caved and started Lemmy's Land, using stories I had already written for myself as the initial content. And while I didn't know at that time exactly what would become of Lemmy's Land, my initial prognosis for what would happen if I started a site was correct, and here we are now.
Boosly: Ah, I see. Now you have 43 sections on the site, do you have a favorite?
Lemmy: Right now I'm smitten with the Sports Hall as I prepare for Season Ten. Fun Fiction was always meant to be the heart of Lemmy's Land, however I may enjoy a good Drawing Board submission more. And for high laugh value with low effort (they're easy for me to post!), ya can't go wrong with a good comic. I'm also a big music guy so the CDs have got to get a nod.
Jalvo: A good comic is hard to find. I know mine aren’t that good. Anyways, what gave you the idea to give your siblings their own page?
Lemmy: Lemmy's Land is supposed to celebrate the villains of the franchise, especially the Koopalings. Even though I was selfish enough to host most of the sections myself, I felt my siblings should be represented with sections too. Frankly though it's inadequate, except for Roy and maybe Wendy.
Boosly: Speaking of Koopalings, you and Iggy are pretty much twins, so excluding Iggy, who is your favorite sibling?
Lemmy: Most of my other siblings don't really seem to know how to have a good time, but Larry does a decent job of lightening up sometimes.
Jalvo: Are there any positives about King Dad? All we hear are the negatives of his fathering skills.
Lemmy: You don't have to call him King Dad... Anyway, he's not exactly the type for father-son bonding but he does want the best for us, I think. When he can figure out how he tries to help us improve, and he definitely cares for our well-being, even if some of his plans put us at risk. You don't become King of the Koopas by regularly giving out hugs, I guess. But as a father I think he does ok.
Bowser: Jalvo, you are not my son, GET BACK TO WORK!
Jalvo: Yes boss-sir-guy!
Boosly: Why were you put in charge of Ice Land?
Lemmy: I love all things wintry. Winter games are the best, so there's not much better than hanging out in a place where it's winter all the time. None of my siblings like the cold that much. I mean, they may be up for a snowball fight or something, but then they're running back inside to the fire! So it worked out pretty well. Oh, and plus, icy ground makes it even tougher to ride a ball - yay!
Jalvo: Speaking of riding a ball, is there any reason you like balancing on a ball?
Lemmy: I think anyone would enjoy it, if they could actually do it. I'm hyper so it's hard for me to stand still, but the ball always gives me something to do. And to be honest, I like showing off! When I'm riding my ball, I don't even have to say anything and it's like automatically saying "Look what I can do!"
Boosly: Care to show us your balancing skills?
Lemmy: Sure, I don’t have a ball on me-
Jalvo: You can use me!
(Jalvo’s legs suck back into his body. All he is now is a giant orange sphere.)
Lemmy: I guess this works.
(Lemmy jumps on top of Jalvo and begins balancing.)
Boosly: Since Jalvo can’t ask questions at the moment, how old were you when you decided to balance on balls?
Lemmy: Super young. Younger than I can remember.
(Lemmy jumps down.)
Jalvo: That was fun. Now, what’s your favorite Mario game?
Lemmy: It's hard to pick just one, but I'll name my favorite for a few genres. For the sidescroller genre I've got to say SMB3, even though NSMBW comes close. For RPGs, Paper Mario 2 may be my favorite in the genre, period... except on the days when I feel I prefer its prequel instead! For the 3D adventures, I have nostalgia for Mario 64 but I'd probably have to say Mario Galaxy... 1, which I think has better, more varied level design than the sequel. For the karts, I feel I got the most enjoyment out of MK64! Among the Parties, it's got to be 3. And for sporting, Mario Baseball on the Wii. Oh, wait, did I somehow not mention Yoshi's Island in any of this? Yikes, any of these could be my favorite depending on my mood.
Jalvo: Man, that’s a pretty good list. My favorite is Yoshi’s Island. Wow, look at the time, it’s time for audience questions!
Boosly: Seat KING OF SECOND BANANAS!
Luigi: Why am I always called on?
Boosly: Just ask a question.
Luigi: What is your favorite minion?
Lemmy: You'll probably laugh but I like Goombas! I like the gruntiest of the grunt minions, and they're cute, too! Shy Guys are great too, especially the mischievous ones from Paper Mario. I tend to give a nod to Flurry from SMB2 as being a cool ice enemy, of which there aren't a whole ton to pick. I'm just not big on Bumpty, Mr. Blizzard doesn't move... I should probably like Ice Brother better, and probably would if I hadn't actually played the games. Because in NSMBW he's annoying! I know I should like him because he makes things tough for Mario, but... Well, don't tell them, anyway, I need them working hard!
Jalvo: Your secret is safe with us… and the audience. Seat KING OF BANANAS!
Donkey Kong: I remember that you mentioned Paper Mario 2 being your favorite RPG. Do you have a favorite partner and boss?
Lemmy: I like Vivian although I have to overlook how she managed not to know or remember Beldam's motives, where the X-Naut base was, and other pretty crucial information. Favorite boss, other than Bowser... I'm probably supposed to say Doopliss, mischievous as he is, but I'll go with Grubba.
Grubba: I like myself too.
Boosly: Seat KING OF THE POND!
Prince Froggy: I’m just a prince!
Boosly: Yeah, we know, that but it ruined the King of something theme. Now ask a question!
Prince Froggy: How come your concept art depicts you having your eyes askew?
Lemmy: My eyes do not keep aligned with one another, which isn't very helpful. I don't like to talk about it. At least it adds to the crazed look I enjoy so much.
Jalvo: Seat KING OF THE GARDEN!
King Croacus: Oooweeoooh! Have you ever been picked on due to your size?
Lemmy: Well, Roy, but he'd find another excuse anyway. My other siblings don't do it too often, maybe as a put-down in the middle of an argument or something. Not too many others are going to pick on a Koopa prince, at least not in front of his face. Actually the worst offender other than Roy is probably King Dad. "Flaming Podoboos, Lemmy!", he'll exclaim, "Can't you grow any bigger?"
Boosly: Your life is pretty tough. Seat KING OF THE GRAVEYARD!
King Boo: Blehehehehe! Have you ever performed in a circus?
Boosly: That question is lamer than my first question!
Lemmy: I have never performed in a real circus. It's kind of my dream. But I wasn't even around for that one cartoon episode, Send in the Clown!
Jalvo: That’s all the questions we ask! Thank you, Lemmy, I hope this Interview went ok.
Lemmy: My pleasure. It was fun.
Jalvo: Boosly?
Boosly: END TRANSMISSION!
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